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MIKE CUNNINGHAM– from Easyriders’ dealer development is nowin charge of Bikers Dream dealer development?
BILL GATES’ ADVICE TO STUDENTS– about 11 things you will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teaching has created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept sets them up for failure in the real world.
RULE 1: Life is not fair – get used to it.
RULE 2: The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
RULE 3: You will NOT make $40,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice president with a carphone. Until you earn both.
RULE 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn’t have tenure.
RULE 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping – theycalled it opportunity.
RULE 6: If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
RULE 7: Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaningyour clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your ownroom.
RULE 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failinggrades and they’ll give you as many times as you want to get theright answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance toANYTHING in real life.
RULE 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.
RULE 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life, people actuallyhave to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
RULE 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.
V-TWIN TAKES TWO BOOTHS FOR POWERSPORTS DEALER EXPO SHOW 2001– V-Twin Holdings Inc.(OTCBB:VTWN) today announced thecompany would attend and display two booths at the upcoming 33rd AnnualDealernews International Powersports Dealer Expo being held Feb. 17-19 in Indianapolis. One booth will feature V-Twin?snewest Web-based, wholesale procurement subsidiary, CycleClick.com. Thesecond booth will feature the Bikers Dream (www.bikers-dream.com) licensingdivision, another wholly owned subsidiary of V-Twin, which operates sixdealerships and licenses the name to 16 independent dealers in 14 states.
Roger Cheek, CEO of V-Twin Holdings stated, ?We are glad to be a part ofthismajor event and are pleased that we are able to launch CycleClick.com atthistime. It is our aim to sign new licensees for Bikers Dream and add to ourgrowing list of new dealers and manufacturers for CycleClick.com with theexposure we anticipate from the show. Our goal is to be known as aB2B, Web-based marketplace builder that integrates industry brick-and-mortarwith a powerful Web-based e-procurement system.?
For additional information, including a copy of the updated financials forV-Twin Holdings Inc., visit the company’s Web site: www.vtwin.net; or call CFSGat (800) 625-2236.
Hey Bandit: Further to my last comment about V-Twin, I was speaking with ananonymous inside source who told me that V-Twin overall is working reallyhard to make a great company and contribution to the motorcycle industry.
Although my professional experience with them had some really frustratingbumps, which the company has since smoothed, their goals seeminglyare in the right place and they want to do right by people and the business.
They are aggresively staffing up and organizing the company. It’s a longroad, though, and everybody deserves a chance to shine and make a place forthemselves in this world. The V-Twin, Bikers Dream and Cycle Click team want to service themarketplace, streamline and evolve their business, and establish greatbusiness and customer relationships. It’s an ambitious goal and a tougheconomical climate (though our industry isn’t really suffering).
Based upon Rich’s keen effort to mend the angst that was caused because Iwas not paid for months and felt like I got the runaround, I’ll saythat, as a leader at the helm of this motorcycle company….he wants to dowhat’s right and he’s alright with me. Rich…keep it real and ridetough. –Sasha
GENERATION GAP–Generation Gap An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, blue,yellow. The old man just stared at him.
The young man said “What’s the matter old fart, never done anything wildin your life?”
The old man replied, “Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my kid.”
THE OLD FART ASSOCIATION–This association was formed when every one started calling me and a few buds “OLD” FARTS, from the “OLD Core” humm. No colors, no meetings and no dues, just riding and beer drinkin!
Rules Requirements
1. seeing a brother, buy him a beer
2. allowing a nap after a 6-pack
3. no bitchen unless someone is there to hear you
4. tums/bengay are community property.
5. if a bud falls, check that he is breathing, then buy him a beer
6. asking a bud to hold your bike while you start it is ok!
1.GRAY HAIR !
2. own a bike or know someone who owns a bike
3.wish you were in bed and not drinking
4.rembember when scooters did not cost $20,000.
5 know who Marlon Brando is and what he rode in the movie
Membership is free, but ya gotta meet the requirementsGRAY HAIR, RIDE and DRINK BEER!
This is the addresshttp://home.earthlink.net/~tgoode/old-farts.html
A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, “Get me abeer before it starts.” The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Fifteen minuteslater, he says, “Get me another beer before it starts.” She looks cross, but fetches another beer and slams it down next to him. He finishes that beer and a few minutes later says, “Quick, get me another beer, it’s going to start any minute.” The wife is furious. She yells at him,
“Is that all you’re going to do tonight, you piece of shit? Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? You’re nothing but a lazy, drunken, fatfuckin’ slob, and furthermore …”
The man sighs and says, “Aww fuck. It’s started.”
THE LOS ANGELES CALENDAR MOTORCYCLE SHOW EXPANDS– to two days this year, July 21-22.The West Coast’s largest Streetbike Show, the White Brothers / Performance Machine / Hot Bike magazine -presented LA Calendar Motorcycle Show was a huge sellout success again last year at the new Queen Mary Event Park in Long Beach. So for this year, producer Jim Gianatsis is expanding theshow to all the spectators and to give exhibitors more time to set up. Show times will run noon to 8 p.m. on Saturday, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Sunday. For the same $15 admission price as last year, spectators will get a two-day show admission pass, admission to the Queen Mary and a fireworks display aboard the ship on Saturday night. Plus, our normal live musical entertainment, beautiful girls, the country’s best custom bike contest and so much more! I hope all the Bikernet readers will join us. Maybe we can talk Bandit into helping us with the judging of the custom bike contest.
Complete details are online athttp://www.FastDates.com
QUANTUM CYCLE REPORT– I have recently recieved my W-2 form from American Quantum Cycles and ithad numerous errors in it. I am not surprised. It has come to my attention that I am not the only one this has happenedto. I have contacted the court and requested that they have mine and any oneelse who has a problem with their W-2 statement corrected. I will also be going to the Internal Revenue Service to see what they say. I would like to suggest that you check your W-2 against your last pay checkreporting slip and make sure it is correct. If not, contact the court andthe IRS.
LAW ABIDING CITIZENS HAVE NOTHING TO FEAR–The same type of “biometric authentication” face scanning system inuse on the streets of London and Japan is now being used in the U.S.Everyone at the Super Bowl had their faces scanned without knowing it.Tampa, Fla., Jan. 29, 2001 -Graphco Technologies Inc. (G-TEC=99),aleading developer of technology and solutions for biometricauthentication,secure access and expert information-sharing systems, announced todaythatthey provided a surveillance and facial recognition system at theRaymond James Stadium in Tampa and at Ybor City, Florida. The system wasinplace from Jan. 21-28 to monitor potential criminalactivities during the sporting events and related activities at the twolocations.
“Not everyone comes to sporting events with good intentions,” says DavidWatkins, G-TEC’s managing director. “The multiple distractions at thenation’s premier athletic events provide criminals with opportunities toengage in a variety of illegal activities. G-TEC’s facial recognitionsystem provided the Raymond James Stadium with a superior surveillancesystem that not only captures images of individuals, but also comparestheirfacial features against a database of known felons.”
=46aceTrac=99 is a trademark of Graphco Technologies, Inc. FaceFINDER=99 is a trade mark of Viisage, Inc, http://www.viisage.com/january_29_2001.htm
THREE MEN WERE DRINKING– in a bar, a doctor, an attorney and a biker. As the doctor was drinking his white wine, he said, “For Valentine’s Day,I’m going to buy my wife a fur coat and a diamond ring. This way if she doesn’t like the fur coat she will still love me because she got a diamondring.”
As the attorney was drinking his martini, he said, “For Valentine’s Day,I’m going to buy my wife a designer dress and a gold bracelet. This way if she doesn’t like the dress she will still love me because she got the gold bracelet.”
As the biker was drinking his shots of whiskey, he said, “For Valentine’s Day, I’m going to buy my wife a T-shirt and a vibrator. This way if she doesn’t like the T-shirt, she can go fuck herself!”
LET’S RIDE—THE TRAIN–for those in the Pacific Northwest or who don’t have lots of time, theAmtrak rail ride to Milwaukee for the 100th anniversary would be a goodway to get you and your bike there and back. Two days over, a week there,and two days back, or something like that.
Call Russ or Barb Martz
(253) 848-5130 weekdays
(360) 289-9744 weekends
LEAVE IT TO A FRENCHMAN– to send me this….from Fennec of the Celtic Brotherhood MC…
“The following is a short and rather amusing true story as seen recently by millions of viewers on a Spanish TV channel.The parents of a teenage girl decided to put their daughter’s name forward for a popular surprise game show. She idolized teeny-bopper pop star Ricky Martin, and it was arranged for TV cameras to be placed discreetly throughout the house. The house was then left empty with Ricky Martin hidden in the wardrobe in the girl’s bedroom– all set to give the daughter a wonderful surprise when she returned home from school. Meanwhile, the parents were in the show’s studio, in front of a live studio audience.
Upon returning from school, the daughter didn’t go straight to her room as expected; Instead she began to investigate the house, calling out the names of her family to see if anyone was at home. Having established that she was on her own, the daughter made her way down to the kitchen where she opened the fridge and removed a large tin of pate. At this stage, the live TV audience is wondering what the hell is going on. She then went back upstairs to her bedroom where she proceeded to quickly remove all her clothes and spread pate all over her naughty bits.
Remember at this stage, that Ricky Martin is still hidden in the wardrobe, and half of Spain is seeing a nubile young girl stark naked on the bed with pate all over her crotch.As if the parents were not shocked enough by this, the daughter then calls the family dog, who obediently trots up the stairs to settle down to his favorite meal.
The broadcast is abruptly cut. A set of acutely embarrassed parents are left in front of a deadly quiet studio audience, while a few million Spaniards sit in front of their TVs pissing themselves with laughter. Consequently, sales of tinned pate have skyrocketed.”
–Deasal
MOTORCYCLE DEMOLITION DERBY AND THRILL SHOW– On March 9, the Motorcycle Demolition Derby and Thrill Show will return to New Smyrna Speedway for the twelfth time. The popular motorcycle thrill show annually entertains overflow crowds of fans from all over the country during Bike Week. This year is no exception as the speedway staff has brought back the most-asked-for events and added some new ones.
The main draw is, of course, the Motorcycle Demolition Derby. The event is open to anyone who wishes to ride in it. The bikers are encouraged to enter their own motorcycles. Since very few riders choose to do this, the speedway provides a large amount of running bikes to pick from. The action is fast and furious with a no-holds-barred set of rules. The winner is determined by the last rider standing or running, as the case may be. There are preliminary events and a monster feature event open to all the riders that survived the preliminaries.
For added entertainment, the three-hour show will include several professional stuntmen doing what comes naturally. World famous stuntman “Death Wish” Dan Elders will attempt to jump a motorcycle over a running helicopter.
Stuntman J. J. Steel will lay down a motorcycle at 70 mph and slide it through a curtain of fire.
Fred Sibley will burn a pile of motorcycles and cars into a molten heap with his jet powered truck.
Jesse the human bomb will blow himself off a bar stool using sticks of dynamite.
Other stunts planned for the event will include the trailer trash stunt, which is described by the speedway event department as crashing a car through a 70-foot mobile home end to end, rollerblading over a fire at 50 mph, an auto T-bone crash, an automobile demolition derby, the exciting rollover contest and, back by popular demand, the wall of steel.
Along with the planned stunts, the fans will be invited to come out of the grandstands and join the fracas with a wheelie contest and the world’s largest beer chug contest.
The Motorcycle Demolition Derby and Thrill Show is sponsored in part by Gilly’s Pub 44, Skips Shoes and Boots and Harley-Davidson.
New Smyrna Speedway is located at the intersection of State Route 44 and Tomoka Farms Road (Route 415), 10 miles south of Daytona Beach. The gates open at 6 p.m.; the show starts at 8 p.m. For further information, call New Smyrna Speedway at (904) 427-4129. Be there, be there, be there!
A YOUNG JEWISH KID– excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love andis going to get married. He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bringover three women and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”
The mother agrees andthe next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits themdown on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, “Okay, Ma.Guess which one I’m going to marry.”
She immediately replies, “The redhead in the middle.”
“That’s amazing, Ma. You’re right. How did you know?”
“I don’t like her.”–from the Original 5-Ball
STATE MOTTOS–
North Carolina: Tobacco is a Vegetable
North Dakota: We Really are One of the 50 States
Ohio: We Wish We Were In Michigan
Oklahoma: Like the Play, Only No Singing
Oregon: Spotted Owl… It’s What’s For Dinner
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Rhode Island: We’re Not Really An Island
South Carolina: Remember the Civil War? We Didn’t Surrender!
THAT’S IT FOR METhis morning started slow with three aspirin and a bowl of cereal. The sun was glistening off the harbor and I needed to ride. I also needed to congratulate Jason Douglass, Mike Osborn and Jon Towle, who are now partners in this madness we call the Bikernet Empire. Now they owe me big time. I tried to launch into the news, but Valentine’s night haunted me. On my list was picking up trophies, which are adorned with billiard 5-balls that just rolled in from a billiard supply company in New York. You wouldn’t believe how difficult it is to find 5-balls. I’m putting the finishing touches on a chapter for my next as-yet nameless book, but it contains the HORSE Vince and Chance series. My brain cells finally cooperated enough to let me write an editorial on some of my past shenanigans, also for HORSE.
If Lee Clemens will talk to me, I’ll interview him next week for Hot Rod Bikes. The oldest living H-D mechanic, Earl Kellerman, turned us down for an interview. He works at Bartels’ and I was told he was a crotchety old fart, but good people if you can corner him in a good mood. We’re about to launch Bandit’s Cantina, with games, Fast Date Girls from Jim and all my books in an e-book format for less than the cost of one beer a month. Watch for it. Alright, so I was scrambling around here this morning like a wheel losing its spokes when there was a gentle tap on the door. Sin was headed for school, but had a while to play. Suddenly my day was in focus, my life fulfilled and the dream of riding a Big Dog motorcycle to Daytona a near-reality. Life is good on the coast once more. Let’s ride–Bandit.
