Amidst threats of the event being shut down by Bible Thumping members of the local town board, plus beer being outlawed, not to mention the ominous heavy presence of John Law and his minions, The Smoke Out 8, Sponsored by Bikernet.com, went off without a hitch. For months before, legal battles raged with the “Good Christian” politicos regarding the event being closed down because, “Jesus doesn't like nipples and wild biker trash.”
Well, for what it's worth, I was always thought that Jesus loves sinners and the love was evident as thousands of the faithful on their “Devilish Machines” flocked to the Holy Land at the Rowan County Fairgrounds to bid a fond farewell to the Smoke Out, at least as far as Salisbury is concerned. No mention of next year's venue, but rest assured that it WILL happen.
Riders from as far away as California and Western Canada to Nueva York and the rock bound coast of Maine handled the pilgrimage to see what their compadres were building and riding. The mood seemed lighter as the weekend rolled on and the flock realized that the good shepherd, John Law, was indeed there to look out for their safety and not lead them to slaughter.
Beer was indeed served like Holy Water and ladies rode nekkid on the mechanical golden calf, voraciously offering up their virtue to the assembled multitudes. Burning tires served as ceremonial incense and High Mass was celebrated with the purification rite of burning a trailer in effigy.
The choir consisted of Devil Doll and the Super-Soakers who led the faithful in song during evening vespers. St. Columbanus, patron saint of Bikers, surely would have bestowed his blessings on the services.
High Priests of Chopper Building, Hank Young, Jay Hart, Paul Cox and Keino of Indian Larry Legacy were on hand to display their icons to the novitiates.
Over 250 bikes were entered into the bike show with awards given out to the top ten winners. Steve “Deuce” Broyles II, of Stevenson’s Cycles, in Michigan, walked away with the trophy for his entry in the Horse Builders Chop Off.
The evening partying at local Holiday Inns parking lot looked like anything but a service at the Crystal Cathedral, America's foremost drive-in place of worship. Despite heavy police presence, tires burned, music blared and nubile young hard-bellies gyrated until dawn, on both Friday and Saturday nights. In the spirit of Christian Charity, the local hotels raised their usual $69 per night to $200 with a 3-night minimum and attempted to charge a tide of $5.00 per head to enter the golden gates of their parking lots. That’s just one aspect of Salisbury that we won't be missing at the new venue.
We don't yet know where or when, but we assure you that next years Gathering of the Faithful will be the most righteous jamboree yet to be seen.
Can I get you to testify???
Amen!
–TBear
That’s not all. A ride to the Smoke Out Report is due to hit the site next week from Art Parry. Check back.–Wrench