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THE BIKERNET KID’S DEPARTMENT–A mother passed by her daughter’s bedroom and was astonished to seethe bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she sawan envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It wasaddressed “Mom”. With the worst premonition she opened the envelopeand read the letter with trembling hands:
Dear Mom,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I am writing you. I had to elope withmy new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and dad. Ihave been finding real passion with John and he is so nice–even with all ofhis tattoos, piercing, beard and his motorcycle clothes. But not only thepassion mom, I’m pregnant and John said that we will be very happy.
He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for thewhole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that’snow one of my dreams too.
John taught me that marijuana does not really hurt anyone and we will begrowing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine andecstasy we want. In the meantime, we will pray that science will find a curefor AIDS so that John can get better; he sure deserves it!!
Don’t worry mom, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care ofmyself. Someday I’m sure we will be back to visit so you can get to knowyour grandchildren.
Your daughter,
Judith
PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I’m over at the neighbor’s house. Ijust wanted to remind you that there are worst things in life than my reportcard which is in my desk drawer.
I love you!! Call me when it is safe for me to come home.
–from Ken Miller
THE P-PAD SEARCH– I am looking for a old Bates P- Pad, any condition ( small one).If you see one in your travels let me know.Not a new one.
–Bob.T
r.tron@verizon.net
ALANTA GEORGIA WINNER–JUST GOT BACK FROM ATLANTA GEORGIA. MY BIKE TOOK 1ST PLACE FOR THE INVITATIONAL CLASS. LAST SHOW AT INDIANA THE BIKE TOOK 2ND PLACE BEST OF SHOW.THEY WANT TO SHOOT THE BIKE AT CHARLOTTE NC IN JANUARY. WE NEED TO GET THINGS GOING BEFORE THAT.CALL ME 330-806-6813.
DISCOVERY CHANNEL WAS AT ATLANTA ALSO,THEY INTERVIEWED ME AND MY WIFE WITH THE BLUE BIKE. THE SHOW WILL AIR DEC.3RD.
–KEN
BIKERNET ON MARRIAGE–It was the stir of the town when an 80 year old man married a 20 year old girl. After a year of marriage she went into the hospital to give birth.
The nurse came out to congratulate the fellow saying, “This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?”
He answered, “You’ve got to keep that old motor running.”
The following year the young bride gave birth again.
The same nurse said, “You are truly amazing. How do you do it?”
He again said, “You’ve got to keep the old motor running.”
The same thing happened the next year.
The nurse then said, “Well, well, well! You certainly are quite a man!”
He responded, “You’ve got to keep that old motor running.”
The nurse then said, “Well, you better change the oil. This one’s black”
–from Bob T.
THE BIKERNET AUSTRALIAN REPORT– About 3 months ago, a mate, Rad, and I packed our bikes for a round trip of about 2,000 klms heading south to a little country town this side of Sydney. The story goes something like this, every year a bunch of guys from all over, ride up to Paul’s farm, arriving Friday nite, heat up the bbq, have a feed and a few drinks and talk bikes ‘n bullshit, then on Saturday it’s off to ride around the hills stopping frequently, (those ol’ country pubs) then back to the farm, another barby and lots more drinks.
Sunday morning, hangovers n’all, they pack up and ride home a little bit worse for wear. It probably sounds like any other biker get together, except these blokes are riding old Knucks, Pan Heads, Walla’s and Indians and I tell you they ride bloody hard!!. I’m getting ahead of myself here, the plan was for Rad to be riding his chopper and me on my Sturgis, but as luck would have it, his bike didn’t get finished in time, so he decided to hire one. We left Noosa at 6am and arrived at Morgan and Wacker’s Harley Davidson in Brisbane as they opened, Rad took care of the the paper work and we were on our way. We chose to go the inland route, less scenic, but a little quicker than the coast road, we had a long day ahead of us.
We dropped in on the gang at ‘Scotty’s Choppers’, one of Aussie’s best bike builders, Scotty and Grant just did a biker build off with Discovery ( I have photos and a story for you guys in the near future ) those of you that saw it, know they build unbelievable bikes, truly one of a kind. We had a great ride down to the farm, got there about 8.30pm, just in time for that bbq I mentioned. I hadn’t met any of the guys yet, I tell you, what a great bunch of blokes , there were handshakes all round, a beer and burger and that was before I got off the bloody bike!!. It didn’t take me long to realize there was a lot of motorcycle knowledge in this gathering at the “Huge Shed” on the farm, I was chatting with guys from all facets of the biking industry, they say you learn something new every day – well my brain was bursting! .
The weekend was a blast, and riding around that part of N.S.W. was fantastic especially with so much old iron. The Pub stops were fantastic, it was like being in a different world. As always, time flys when you are having a good time and before we knew it we were packing our bikes and heading back home. It was 5am and bloody freezing on that Sunday . You might remember I did a trip down to Melbourne in Victoria at the start of last winter and I froze my arse off, well, I said then that I would get myself a Widder electric vest and I did. I’ve gotta tell you, it’s the best money I’ve spent in a long time, so if you feel the cold or ride in extreme weather, I recommend you check out their website and order now – especially with your winter on its way. I’ll follow up with a Product report.
That said, Rad and I had a great ride home and are already planning next years trip, with a few minor differences, one being, an extra day to get there – so we can cruise, and another is, I’ll be riding my ’63 Pan ( it WILL be finished by then! ) and Rad will be on his Chopper.
–Glen, the Aussie connection
NO LOVE PARTY REPORT–Sorry I missed you at No Love Party. I wasn’t able to swing by the Bikernet Headquarters as I was handcuffed with some other people and I couldn’t get away. I was hoping you would make it over to Buster’s “Q” or that I would have seen you at WCC but it wasn’t to be.
I finally finished my chopper in September and have been riding the shit out of it. I brought it out to NLP to do some riding. I will be coming out again soon for business and will bring it to do some more riding.
I’m pretty proud of it for my first effort, I hope you enjoy!
–Forrest P.
Oh! Oh!–Bubba and Billy Bob were sitting on the tailgates of their pick-upsshooting the breeze.
Bubba asks Billy Bob, “If I snuck ovah to yore house while you wuz outfishin an’ made love to your wife, and she got pregnant, would dat makeus kin?”
Billy Bob scratched his head for a bit then said, “I don’t thinkso…..but it shore would make us even!”
–from Skooter
MIKE PHILLIPS OF GRANEUR CYCLES HIT–Hi Guys, I just got this email from Kendall Johnson’s wife, Missy. I thought I would pass this on to you and you can do your thing with it. Mike Phillips of Grandeur Cycles was in an accident a few days ago. It was raining and dark and a car rear ended him while he was riding his bike. He spent a few days in the hospital but has come home and is recovering well as I understand it.
Thought some of the guys may want to wish him a quick recovery. Mike’s email is –Missy Johnson
NEW FUBAR FRAMES–The FUBAR is the chopper frame, and the DILLIGAF is the Pro-street.
–Derol
OKAY GODDAMNIT, I QUIT–Even I get a holiday once in a while. Happy Thanksgiving, eat hearty, slow down and relax. Take a moment and be damn thankful for all the pals you have, the women in your life, the bitchin’ bikes and that you’re still alive and watching the sunset. Life changes in the blink on an eye.
A long time Custom Chrome employee died last weekend in his hotel room while sleeping. We were attending the Big-Twin West dealer show. Our thoughts go out to Nate’s family.
So if you’re still out there splittin’ lanes, make the best of it.
Ride Forever,
–Bandit
