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Bikernet Joke
The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes. So the one nun says to the other, “Hey, let’s take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door.”
So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, “Who is it?”
“Blind man!”
The nuns look at each other, then one nun says, “He’s blind, he can’t see. What could it hurt.” They let him in.
The blind man walks in and says, “Hey, nice tits. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?”
Subject: New Drug
Police warn all male clubbers, partygoers and unsuspecting pub regularsto be more alert and cautious when getting a drink offer from a girl.There is a date rape drug going around called “beer” and it is generallyin liquid form. The drug is now being used by female sexual predators atparties to convince their male victims to have sex with them. Theshocking statistic is that “beer”is available virtuallyanywhere!
All girls have to do is persuade a guy to consume a few units of “beer”and simply ask the guy home for no-strings-attached sex. Men areliterally rendered helpless against such attacks. After several”beers” men will often succumb to desires to perform sex acts onhorrific looking women who they would never normally be attracted to.
Men often awaken after being given “beer” with only hazy memories ofexactly what has happened to them the night before, just a vague feelingthat something bad occurred.
At other times these unfortunate men might be stung for their life’sworth in a familiar scam know as “a relationship” – apparently men areeasier victims for this scam after the “beer” has been administered andhave already been sexually attacked.
OK, goddamnit, we’re about 40.14 North and 51.32 West heading into the center of the Atlantic. The Newfoundland Island is northwest of us by 150 miles if my cross-eyed guessing is close. It’s strange that the coast is dropping into the 40-degree range and we roll out to sea and face 75-degree temperatures in the Gulf Stream. It’s incredible the change in temperature. When we dipped out of the Gulf Stream last night, the thermometer dropped 10 degrees and another storm struck, driving us into swells the size of homes I wish I was huddled in with Layla. We are taking 6- and 8-degree rolls that scattered cups of coffee around the deck in the officers’ dining room. Everything not tied down was tossed like fruit in a blender. I could swear that at 4 in the morning I could hear dishes crashing four decks below. I was rolling around in my bunk like a hotdog on a barby, but couldn’t decide whether to risk getting out of the sack to lash down gear or pull the covers up to keep me from the bitter cold that was biting my ankles.
The captain tried to explain the Gulf Stream to me and I found it fascinating. If it weren’t for this body of water rushing north out of the tropics and the easterly wind that runs over it constantly, all of England, France and Germany would be a frozen blob like most of Canada. Europe better pray it never changes course.About the site. Last month, Bikernet?s hit counter struck an all-time high of 1.7 million hits. The girls have taken over and will for sure start some feminist/lesbian rally to yank the reigns from my salt water frozen hands. If you’ve been following Vince and Chance or the Chance Hogan series, I’m working on Chapter 15 of that saga, and I’ll finish Chapter 8 of the Chance book based on this trip, better known as “Tides.” I’m still working, I swear, as the Atlantic brine splashes around my ankles. I’m on E deck, five floors above the main deck. The chair I’m sitting in slides up to the desk then back across the room from time to time to gimme a break.
I’m having a helluva time. Hope you’re having a helluva holiday season. I can’t wait to swim into the officers’ lounge this morning to see what happened to the Christmas tree.
Ride forever, and stay warm, goddamnit
Bandit
