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A COP PULLS A GUY OVER–for speeding and asked, “May I seeyour driver’s license?”
The driver answered, “I don’t have one. I had itsuspended when I got my 5th DUI.”
The officer asked, “May I see the owner’s card for this vehicle?”
Thedriver answered, It’s not my car. I stole it.”
The officer asked, “Thecar is stolen?”
The driver answered, “That’s right. But come to thinkof it, I think I saw the owner’s card in the glove box when I wasputting my gun in there.”
The officer asked, “There’s a gun in the glove box?”
The driveranswered, “Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot and killed thewoman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.”
The officer asked, “There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?”
The driveranswered, “Yes, sir.”
Hearing this, the officer immediately called hiscaptain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captainapproached the driver to handle the tense situation. The Captain asked, “Sir, can I see your license?” The driver answered,
“Sure. Here it is.” It was valid.
The Captain asked, “Who’s car is this?”
The driver answered, “It’s mine,officer. Here’s the owner’ card.” The driver owned the car.
The Captain asked, “Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see ifthere’s a gun in it?”
The driver answered, “Yes, sir, but there’s nogun in it.” Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
The Captain asked, “Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told yousaid there’s a body in it.”
The driver answered, “No problem.”Trunk is opened; no body.
The Captain said, “I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped yousaid you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gunin the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.”
Thedriver answered, Yeah, I’ll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I wasspeeding, too!”
–Needlin’ Dan
“To do good things for people is the rent that we pay for living onearth.” – Mohammed Ali
HOTTIE FROM HORSE–Here’s a teaser for an issue to come of the famous outlaw, chopper rag HORSE. Watch for it, and check the current issue.
Damn, they need to change that name. I can’t tell anyone about this rag without explaining the title. The last guy I mentioned it to asked if the rag was about heroin.
GET INVOLVED WITH BIKERS’ RIGHTS– Our culture is under attack by legislators in every state. If we don’t get involved in politics soon, motorcycling will eventually go the way of the horse & buggy. Don’t believe me? How many of you would ride with a big day-glow orange suit on, if it was law? How many would not mind the huge reflectors on your back and chest, or the mufflers on your bike that are the size of stack on a Mack truck? What about the seat belts they keep trying to introduce, or helmet laws?
You see, there are many ways to skin a cat, and devious lawmakers will stoop to any depth to achieve their goals. Most of our elected lawmakers don?t even drive themselves around anymore, let alone ride motorcycles. The thought of a noisy motorcycle passing their limousine in traffic makes them cringe.
Protect your rights. Vote! in local, state, and national elections. Vote for reformers, people that vow to protect and preserve the Constitution, as it was written.
Make use of lobbyists to take our issues to the politicians. A lobbyist can get an aud ience with a legislator and push our issues. When a politician backs our issues, we back him with votes. Politicians only cater to big blocks of voters, If you represent a minority of voters, forget it, your cause isn?t getting the attention it deserves.
The ball’s in your court. You can get busy, or lie down and die as a culture. The choice is yours.
–Rusty AFFA
JOHN SIEBENTHALER IS A GOD– Yes, if it weren’t for the mastermind, we would be nothing. This is a perfect example. We sent him a scan of the above print and below is the masterpiece poster he created for the bus stop in Laughlin. We’re trying to keep him happy so he’ll keep us on the map with his boundless talent. If you’d like to have this caliber of artistic ability shoving your company to the forefront of the industry, give him a call: (727) 397-5087
19TH ANNUAL DICE THROW RUN, MAY, 5, 2001– Tacoma Chapter ABATE’s 19th Annual Dice Throw Run was an enjoyable 130 mile ride around the scenic South Sound area. Ninety seven riders rolled the dice at six check points to determine who would win the 5 handmade wood dice trophies.
It was a beautiful warm day with spring “bustin’ out all over”, views of mountains and water at every turn, and the comradrie of almost a hundred scooter enthusiasts celebrating life and brotherhood. Over $800 was raised for the Child Guidance Association summer camp for behaviorally challenged children.
Having fun and benefiting the community – does it get any better than this?
–Mailman
WA ABATE member 1674
Dice Throw Run Coordinator
Tacoma, WA
BEACH RIDE LOOMING AHEAD JULY 15–Larry Hagman’s the Grand Marshall and there will be a number of celebrities attending including John Belushi (we hope). Edgar Winter will even assist with the auction of two celebrity signed guitars before he rocks the park.
The Kick-off party is scheduled to coincide with Bartels’ Custom Bike Show at the Dealership in Marina Del Rey, California, June 24th. Check in is 9:00 a.m.
I’m running the bike show the day of the Beach Ride, so bring ’em on. Get ’em out, polish ’em up and show ’em off. If you’re in the industry and inclined to sponsor the Trophies for the bike show, get ready to write a check and e-mail me at Bandit@Bikernet.com.
BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT– Oh well, life ain’t too bad. We have another Miss Universe, TitoTrinidad our world class boxer beat the crap out of Joppy, and Summer isalmost here. Sturgis is a couple months away and many more states arefighting their right to ride helmet free.
The choppers are taking shapelittle by little, and the struts are on the softail as of now. Hell if itkeeps going like this we might get an Easyriders shoot, or get invited tojoin the Hamsters…. Check out the West Coast Chopper bike before takingit apart for paint. That bike will soon be done and hopefully featured herein Bikernet.com
I don’t know about you guys (and gals) but building a bike is almost morefun than actually riding, when everything clicks together, even when afender fits without tons of labor, that’s pretty cool, like we installedthis rigid flat fender on a sporty rigid frame with a sissybar and wham !It fit first try and looked good enough to tack weld the bungs, thatspretty good. Anyway since there are not that many news this week, Besidesthat our local Harley Davidson dealer, Motorsport, moved into a bigger andbetter space.
Oh well time to get back to the shop and do some more grinding andwelding, sell some parts and hear the same, never-ending stories. Maybetomorrow we won’t get those tropical afternoon showers and might hit thecobblestones once more……After all the years still love that rumblingsound echoing on the 500 year old buildings in the Old San Juan City.
-Jose
To: “Keith R. Ball”
Subject: RE: Help!!
Date: Sun, 13 May 2001 22:01:52 -0700
X-Priority: 3 (Normal)
Importance: Normal
Thank you, I have been searching the web a lot, no luck. – Joe
LOOKIN’ FOR LEE MARVIN SHOT–That’s it. I’m looking for a black and white publicity shot of Lee Marvin in “The Wild One.” Any help would be most appreciated.
–“HRF” IDIOT AWARD FOR THE WEEK– Seems that a year ago, some Boeing employees on the airfielddecided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful ingetting it out of the plane and home. When they took it for a float on theriver, a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them surprised them.Itturned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locatorbeaconwhich activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longeremployed at Boeing. Here’s your sign guys. Don’t get it wet, the paint might run. Shot of Bandit and John Buttera receiving his office chopper desk. Bandit lost it when John told him that he was paying for it with old nuts and washers. MICHAEL LICHTER’S PHOTOGRAPH EXIBITION AT THE JOURNEY MUSEUM IN RAPID CITY– April 4, 2001.If more information is needed for your organization or publication, please contact Michael Lichter (Tel: 303 449-3906, email mike@lichterphoto.com) or Sharon Martin at the Journey Museum (Tel: 605 394-6923, email: smartin@journeymuseum.org) “Biker Generation” at The Journey Museum will containPhotographs by Michael Lichter with custom bikes by Mitch Bergeron, Jesse James, Fred Kodlin, Billy Lane, Bob McKay, Jim Nasi, Arlen Ness, Cory Ness, Ron Simms, Donnie Smith, Russ Tom, Eddie Trotta and Paul Yaffe. The Journey Museum in Rapid City, South Dakota will be hosting a photography exhibition by Michael Lichter titled “Biker Generation” The images, which include many of Michael’s best known works from twenty years of photographing the biker lifestyle, will be on display from August 4 through September 3, 2001. Thirteen of the finest custom motorcycles by some of the most famous bike builders in the world will be on display with the photographs in the gallery as well as in the museum atrium from August 4 through August 11, 2001. An opening reception that Michael Lichter and most of the participating builders will be present at is scheduled for Tuesday, August 7th from 4 – 8pm. Also featured will be one of Bandit’s Office Choppers, a scooter desk for the rider who can’t leave the highway behind. The above shot depicts Bandit’s most recent creation with the new owner John Buttera. Don’t miss the exhibit. TIME’S A WASTIN’–There are times in your life when necessity calls for impenetrable inner strength. Popeye called on spinach for the drive to cast him from the hands of evil. As it turns out, Layla’s great grandfather was a fisherman off the coast of Santa Monica. He was a charismatic pipe smoker and noted fisherman who helped save the harbor from over net-fishing. He was also a good friend of the artist who created the legendary Popeye cartoon. The artist created the character after Layla’s grandfather. Yeah, so what. Well, we were incarcerated on this ship when my cell phone jiggled in my pocket. Even surrounded by slabs of steel hull, the message got through. A woman needed me, and needed me bad. Disguised as travel agents on a tour of the ship, we escaped to keep the party alive. Thank the gods of chrome, the sun is still out and we’re free once more–let’s ride.–Bandit
