Smoke-Out Nine Investigation

The Smoke Out 9 Rally provided two days of outstanding weather and none stop action. The main attraction, of course, was the 2-wheel artists blasting their latest designs down the Farmington Raceway.

Everything from techno-chops to resurrected cruisers from the ‘80s made it out to the 2008 edition of the Smoke Out. Low and loud, that’s how we like 'em.

Smokeout  Winner
Bare Knuckle Choppers – Chop Off Winner

Bare Knuckle Choppers of Missouri came away with the Chop Off win. The power plant is a Panhead lower and Knucklehead upper. The rocker boxes are custom made and required 18 weeks on the CNC machine to program and fabricate. The exhaust system is stainless steel without a weld seam to be found. The bright work is nickel and shined to a rich luster. Starting out front is a hand-built springer front end. Again, flawless construction and design.

beaner
All the Ladies Check In With the Beaner

Across from the event sponsors of Sucker Punch Sally’s, Baker Transmission and Torian Chopper Leathers was biker bon vivant Beaner. He held court with the ladies as there was always some biker babe putting a squeeze on him.

Beaner put on a show and won the minibike contest with an alcohol-fed two stroke. The contest was held late on Saturday night and the guy in the guerrilla suit gave him a run for his money early in the contest but wasn't a match for the consistency of the Beaner. Even so, it wasn’t all smooth sailing… he would have lapped the field if he hadn't spun out as much as he did.

The Bean-man had to pull freight early on Sunday because of a hot date with a female pro wrestler he met through MySpace. It sounds like the two could be in hug & headlock bliss.

Smokeout Sign
The Boys Just Want To Have Fun

A Smoke Out would not be a Smoke Out without a wet t-shirt contest and bike wash. The tasty young nubile virgins were doing their thing and keeping the throng of bikers entertained. If you need to man-up you had your choice between and old-skool “ring-the-bell” carnival midway contest and an electric bull ride. Both drew loads of people.

Jeral Tidwell designed the event poster and t-shirt. He was regaling us with how he started his art career in third grade and exchanged cartoons for good grades in penmanship. Back in the day he got dates by drawing their favorite toon with a snappy caption. He’s been trading his expertise ever since. His work can be seen on corporate campaigns from Kawasaki to General Motors.

A good rally wouldn’t be complete without music. And the show had five bands performing including the Belmont Playboys, Deadbolt, Aliwiscious Farhatt, Straight 8’s and Kelly and the Cowboys. The music was all good.

Chop Engine
Smoke Out Power plants Come in all Shapes & Sizes

New for 2008 is a Thrill Show with Thrill Kill Jill and Stephen Frye… fire eating and sword swallowing kind of stuff. The Columbia, SC and Charlotte, NC Roller Derby Girls were battling it out on Saturday on the drag strip. These sassy vixens can skate and throw a punch… oh yeah. They had that Goth chick look and fit right in.

The police were in force. They all dressed in their very best SWAT attire and seemed to fit right in too.

What turned the Smoke Out into a great rally was the kickass drag strip. During each run a smoking-hot chick would send the boys down the raceway. Everything from customs to jap chops to baggers were running for bragging rights. Nothing was timed, you just mano a mano with the sled next to you.

Much of the contest was waiting for an impending disaster… you just knew someone was going to wad it up on the guard rail. Not so, the boys kept the rubber side down and the tires a smokin.

If you want to see more pictures of the event, go to Torian Chopper Leathers’ gallery.

Edge produced the show and it looked like he put another memorable one in the bag. If you missed it, you still have time to plan to attend Smoke Out West… it is just a few months away, see ya there.

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