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Cutie By Rogue
Pearly Gates–Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparing stories on how they died.
1st woman: I froze to death.
2nd woman: How horrible!
1st woman: It wasn’t so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?
2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
1st woman: So what happened?
2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up, rushing around the house, looking everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I had a heart attack, keeled over, and died.
1st woman: Too bad you didn’t look in the freezer. We’d both still be alive.
Art F.
Letter From a Fallujah Marine–While U.S. and Arab media went pedal-to-the-metal with the NBC video of a Marine in Fallujah committing the “atrocity” of defending himself and his platoon against a wounded terrorist, PowerlineBlog.com has helped put the incident in perspective by publishing a letter from a brother Marine who describes just what our guys are up against.
A young Marine and his cover man cautiously enter a room just recently filled with insurgents armed with AK-47’s and RPG’s. There are three dead, another wailing in pain. The insurgent can be heard saying, “Mister, mister! Diktoor, diktoor (doctor)!”
He is badly wounded, lying in a pool of his own blood. The Marine and his cover man slowly walk toward the injured man, scanning to make sure no enemies come from behind. In a split second, the pressure in the room greatly exceeds that of the outside, and the concussion seems to be felt before the blast is heard. Marines outside rush to the room, and look in horror as the dust gradually settles. The result is a room filled with the barely recognizable remains of the deceased, caused by an insurgent setting off several pounds of explosives.
The Marines’ remains are gathered by teary-eyed comrades, brothers in arms, and shipped home in a box. The families can only mourn over a casket and a picture of their loved one, a life cut short by someone who hid behind a white flag. No one hears these stories, except those who have lived to carry remains of a friend, and the families who loved the dead. No one hears this, so no one cares.
The next day, same Marine, same type of situation, a different story. The young Marine and his cover man enter a room with two wounded insurgents. One lies on the floor in a puddle of blood, another against the wall. A reporter and his camera survey the wreckage inside, and in the background can be heard the voice of a Marine, “He’s moving, he’s moving!”The pop of a rifle is heard, and the insurgent against the wall is now dead. Minutes, hours later, the scene is aired on national television, and the Marine is being held for committing a war crime. Unlawful killing.
And now, another Marine has the possibility of being burned at the stake for protecting the life of his brethren. His family now wrings their hands in grief, tears streaming down their face. Brother, should I have been in your boots, I too would have done the same.
For those of you who don’t know, we Marines, Band of Brothers, Jarheads, Leathernecks, etc., do not fight because we think it is right, or think it is wrong. We are here for the man to our left, and the man to our right. We choose to give our lives so that the man or woman next to us can go home and see their husbands, wives, children, friends and families.
For those of you who sit on your couches in front of your television, and choose to condemn this man’s actions, I have but one thing to say to you. Get out of your recliner, lace up my boots, pick up a rifle, leave your family behind and join me. See what I’ve seen, walk where I have walked. To those of you who support us, my sincerest gratitude. You keep us alive. I am a Marine currently doing his second tour in Iraq. These are my opinions and mine alone. They do not represent those of the Marine Corps or of the US military, or any other.
RONALD J. BATTERSBY, Lt Col, USAF
Aide-de-Camp to the Deputy Chairman
NATO Military Committee
Tel: 00-32-2-707-5349 (within Europe)
Tel: 011-32-2-707-5349 (dialing from USA)
DSN: (314)-365-9449
Gsm (cell): 047-770-7082
Rogue
Scott Jacobs Lost Painting’48 PANHEADS – painted by Scott Jacobs in 1994 (fourth Harley painting ever by Scott), sold to private collector at Bike Week same year. Never produced as a print, resurfaces three weeks ago. Scott wanted for years to create a print edition of this early work but was unable to do so without the painting. As fate would have it, the owner of the work called Scott recently and now we have a new print edition.
This is classic Jacobs’ realism with killer reflections in the chrome painting within a painting reflecting the headlight. This piece is also one of the most talked about images in Scott’s coffee table book and gives one insight into the infant stages of Jacobs’ career. For further details give me a call or email back.
Attn. Dealers..ask about the free art sales training conference for your staff. (Takes about an hour)
Ron Copple
Scott Jacobs Studio
303-431-4453
FENDERS BY KUSTOMWERKS–
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ANOTHER BIKERNET PRODUCT OF THE WEEK–Beer Vault !I been a custom painter/pinstriper 30 years and came up with this shopfridge artwork that looks like an antique safe. Thanks for taking the timeto have a look!
Hey Bandit, I thought some of the guys might get a kick out of this news about a movie currently being filmed in New Zealand. Here’s the press release from a local rag here. I’m looking forward to seeing this film. He was a legend:
[Invercargill, New Zealand]. ? November 15, 2004 ? A Hollywood movie titled The World?s Fastest Indian, is being made about New Zealand motorbike speed legend Burt Munro. Oscar award winning Sir Anthony Hopkins (Hannibal, Silence of the Lambs, The Human Stain, Remains of the Day, Shadowlands, Meet Joe Black, Mask of Zorro, Nixon) is to play Burt Munro. The movie crew will follow Burt?s journey from California to the Salt Lake Flats of Utah. Filming will then commence in Invercargill and at Southland?s beautiful Oreti Beach, where Burt held many of his speed trials to test his bike. Burt Munro gave his life?s work to re-engineering a 1920 Indian Scout motorbike (the Munro Special Indian) to break records throughout New Zealand and the USA from the 1920s through to the mid 1970s.
Burt Munro was an extraordinary man of his time, a legend of speed who went through all odds to achieve what he did in his lifetime and at his age. Still racing and breaking records at 77, Burt himself said ?anyone can buy a bike and ride it, if riding it is 100th of the actual experience needed.? What Burt did however, was take this to the nth degree by re-engineering a 1920 Indian motorcycle capable of 55 to 60 mph in its day to break records at incredible speeds approaching 200 mph. The record he holds is recorded at 183.586 mph in 1967 at the Bonneville Speed Week in Utah. He still holds this record today for a 1920 Indian Scout motorcycle.The Director of The World?s Fastest Indian, Roger Donaldson has a number of Hollywood films under his belt: The Recruit, Thirteen Days, Cocktail, Dante?s Peak, Sleeping Dogs, No Way Out and Smash Palace.
A motorbike enthusiast himself, Roger Donaldson heard about Burt Munro?s remarkable achievements back in the early 70s and made a documentary about Burt when he was still alive. The documentary covers Burt on the Salt Lake Flats of Utah and working on his bike in his workshop shed in Invercargill, New Zealand. During his lifetime, Burt made the journey 14 times to the Bonneville Speed Week at the Salt Flats of Utah from 1962 to 1977, to test out his latest mechanical development on his bike and have its speed professionally recorded.He would then return to Southland, New Zealand and work up to 18 hours a day to tune, re-build and re-engineer his bike, before returning to Utah for speed recording again. Endowed with an incredible talent for all things mechanical, he made his own lubrication system, pistons, flywheels, cylinder barrels, con-rods (from Caterpillar tractor axles), cams and followers. He also experimented with streamlining and, in its final form, the bike was enclosed in a streamliner shell. He had got the idea for the design of the shell while watching the incredible speeds of gold fish at Invercargill?s Queens Park?s ponds. American Motorcycle Cycle Book reported it as the only streamliner on the Slat Flats in a 1968 article.
Burt is also remembered for his enduring personality, charm and charisma, all of which remain etched on the minds of people he came across, as do his many interesting accidents and 250 engine blowups which came hand in hand with engineering his bikes to go such incredible speeds. In 1977, Burt recorded all his illnesses and broken bones. These included: 8 concussions, seven broken bones, a hemorrhage of the brain, 5 minor heart attacks, malaria fever, small pox and temporary blindness. George Begg?s book, Burt Munro Indian Legend of Speed, recorded that at the age of 77 when in hospital with a stroke he told a reporter ?I am hoping to get my 1936 Velocette (motorbike) going good enough to prove it is the fastest Velo in the world, just as my Indian Scout is?. According to Ivan Rhodes of Derby, England, President of the Velocette Owners Club, Burt?s highest speed of over 142mph would have the fastest speed ever recorded on a Velocette. So he already had the record.
Although Burt Munro had recorded the fastest speeds ever, on both his bikes, he continued to scheme how to improve their performance further, ?faster and faster.?The film is set to capture the striving spirit inherent in Burt?s makeup and also reveal a man very much respected and liked for his persistence, humour and quirkiness.Burt Munro was truly unstoppable. His love for motorbikes and his passion for mechanical tinkering saw him achieve the fastest 1920 Indian Scout in the world. The World?s Fastest Indian will capture all of this with splendid backdrops of the very unusual Salt Lake Flats, the desert roads of the US, one of the world?s southern most beaches (Oreti Beach), the streets of Invercargill and the rolling grassland plains and farms of Southland, where Burt grew up. The film crew has commenced filming in America and will commence filming in New Zealand on the 22 of November.
Thanks, whoever you are?
BIKERNET AUSSIE REPORT?Australia is a bit behind with the Discovery’s Biker Build Offs, so far they haven’t reached Down Under, except for Monster Garage and O.C.C, which are bloody fantastic, so I guess it’s only a matter of time before we see them down here. Earlier in the year I dropped into Scotty’s Choppers in Uralla N.S.W. while Discovery was filming the build of his latest creation for the World Biker Build-Off . The contest was between The Martin Brothers from Dallas and Russell Mitchell from Exile Cycles in L.A. and our one and only Scotty Cox from Scotty’s Choppers in Australia. They were given 5 weeks to build their bikes from the ground up in front of cameras and then meet in Daytona where the bikes were to be judged by the public at the famous Rats Hole Bike show. As you guys are aware, The Martin Brothers build cool bikes, sleek and low, with lots of one-off parts and Joe doing all of the paint and graphics. Next is Exile with his unique, old school styling, fat tyres and clean, simple lines. And lastly Scotty Choppers.
In 1999 Scotty Cox and Grant Purkiss, who is Scotty’s long time friend and financial backer, got together, formed a company and opened their shop in a remote part of Australia, miles from any major city where the neighbors are kangaroos and crows, that’s where they started building some serious choppers. The thing that sets these guys apart, is that, apart from the frame and swing arm which are fabricated in steel, everything else, like the fuel tank, oil tank, front and rear mudguards,(fenders), headlight and handlebars as well as the chainguard are all hand fabricated in aluminum, then highly polished. I tell you what, these bikes are works of art, seeing them on T.V. or in a magazine does not do them justice. On a recent trip I got to check out their Discovery bike finished, and it’s truly something else. Scotty and his crew love what they do and are dedicated and work hard at building 1st class choppers. In 2001 their extraordinary one-off rolling masterpiece called “The Aluminator” earned them the Best Custom Bike in Australia. From there they took it to the U.S. where it won the Outstanding All-Over Design at the Masters Pro Bike Show in Daytona Beach. Getting back to the Discovery’s World Biker Build Off, Scotty and the crew came in 2nd with the Martin Brothers taking the title for the Worlds Best Bike Builder and Russell from Exile came in third. No disgrace in any of that – they’re all sensational motorcycles.
It seems Scotty has the U.S.A. in his sights, so look out America, you’ve not seen or heard the last of these top Aussie builders, check them out on their web site www.scottyschoppers.com.au.
PS: The photo of the bike with the blue frame is Scotty on the bike and Grant standing behind him. The other shot is Scotty building the Discovery bike.
Regards,
Glenn
INDIAN WISDOM–An old Indian Chief sat in his hut on a reservation, smoking a ceremonial pipe and eyeing two U.S. government officials sent to interview him… “Chief Two Eagles”, asked one official, “You have observed the white man for 90 years. You’ve seen his wars and his material wealth. You have seen his progress and the damage he has done.”
The chief nodded in agreement.
The official continued, “Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?”
The chief stared at the government officials for over a minute and then calmly replied… “When white man found the land, Indians were running it…
No Taxes,
No Debt,
Plenty Buffalo,
Plenty Beaver,
Women did all the work,
Medicine Man was free,
Indian man spent all day hunting and fishing, all night enjoying spouse.”
Then the chief leaned back and smiled… “Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that.”
Vern
DO YOU WANNA BE ON TV?–First of all I must say that your website was very impressionable, it took me back to the good old days. By the way I am Becky and I work in the Casting Division of Fox’s family show Trading Spouses. I was checking out your website and thought that maybe you could aide me in my search. We are looking for Biker families with two parental units and children above the age of six. At the end of our 7-day shoot, each family gets to spend $50,000. If this is an experience you might be interested in or know a family that would be great for our show, please contact me. If you have any questions in regards to the nature of our show please call me or check out our web site www.fox.com and click on the Trading Spouses icon. I hope to hear from you!
Thank you,
Becky
Rebecca Reczek
Casting Associate
Rocket Science Labs
(323) 802-0413 Direct
(818) 321-4765 Cell
rreczek@rocketsciencelabs.com
Broke is Broke — A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
” Good morning, ” said the young man. “If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners. ”
“Go away!” said the old lady. “I haven’t got any money!” and she proceeded to close the door.
Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed wide open.
“Don’t be too hasty!” he said. “Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.” And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.
“If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.”
The old lady stepped back and said, “Well I hope you’ve got a damned good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning.”
Vern
A PARKING PROBLEM–One winter morning a couple was listening to the radio over breakfast. They hear the announcer say, “We are going to have 8 to10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even- numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.” Norman’s wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through.” Norman’s wife goes out and moves her car again.
The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park……. ” Then the electric power goes out. Norman’s wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, “Honey, I don’t know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?” With all the love and understanding in his voice that all men who have been married more than once have, Norman says, “Why don’t you just leave it in the garage this time
RevCarl
THAT AIN?T WORKIN?–Here’s some out-takes from last week… The pretty blonde model is a friend of mine?s daughter. The blue bikini stuff is for a HOT ROD BIKES layout and the black nightie thing was just for giggles.
The bike going up with the pitchfork sissy bar is the early stages of “Weed Killer” it’s a tribute bike being built in honor of the Orange County Choppers’ guys from the crew at STREET CHOPPER… We figured it was time to give a little back in appreciation of what their show has done for our industry.
Best, Crazy John
That?s it for the news.It?s 7:30pm Pacific, and my daughter has been hovering for the last hour. On the first Thursday of every month, they have what?s called ?First Thursday? in San Pedro. All the shops in the artsy area of town stay open late, the art galleries serve cheese, crackers and wine, and street vendors serve food from different countries. It?s a great time to see people you haven?t seen since the last First Thursday, and that?s where I?m heading now.
Have a great weekend,
Layla
