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‘Twas the night before Christmas–Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!
I’ve busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of “Thanks Santa”–what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money–The reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes–if that ain’t damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
And the kids these days–they all are the pits
They want the impossible–Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls…Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo’s–No request for them,
They want computers and robots…they think – I’m IBM!
Flying through the air…dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I’m quitting this job there’s just no enjoyment
I’ll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.
There’s no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde. I’m going SOUTH for the season
–from Igor
APC’S NEW ’08 WILD CARD S300–Las Vegas, NV – American Performance Cycle, a market leading world class custom production bike manufacturer located in Las Vegas, NV introduces their new ’08 Wild Card S 300, a drop seat pro-street style bike packed full of features found on bikes costing ten’s of thousands of dollars more.
The Wild Card features a blind side swing arm, 5″ frame stretch and a 44 degree rake and start at just $26,995. APC has reengineered their entire product line so that all of their models are now offered with a right side drive, Baker 6-speed, billet closed primaries, forged one-piece Forge-Tec or 80 spoke wheels and way too much chrome and billet to list.
They have also decided to go “bigger” with their rear tires and most models will be available with either 240, 280, 300 or 330 rear tires.
Mike Sample Jr., Vice President of APC stated, “We have four distinct models with various versions of each one (chopper, drop seat, FLH style and pro-street) that are all reasonably priced, but can be custom built with a variety of options to suit the most discriminating buyer.” Sample added, “Three out of our four models are available in three different packages, ranging from a 96″ S&S motor all the way to a show quality polished 124″ S&S engine.” All APC bikes are easily registered insured and are financeable through all major banks and lending institutions. Flooring is now available for those dealers that qualify through GE Capital.
All APC models are CARB and DOT approved. For dealers interested in adding APC bikes to their current product line up and getting up to 12 months of free flooring, please call (702) 314-5272 or check out their website at www.apccycles.com.
Check out APC’s complete ’08 product line at www.apccycles.com or write to them at American Performance Cycles, 6895 Speedway Blvd., Suite Z101, Las Vegas, NV 89115.
BIKERNET OFFICIAL COLD NORTH WEATHER REPORT–While my wife, Fran, is getting ready to cross countryski this morning, I thought I would send you TWO attachedimages depicting the weather report for our region. We were up in Leadville, COyesterday taking photos. Yes it was COLD.
Have a Great Christmas.
–George Emmons Najar
THEY’RE GUILTY BUT THANKFUL–We know all of your are busy so we’ll make this short. We wish all of you, who that have given words of encouragement/advice OR have featured us in your magazines, blog or website OR have taken time out from your busy schedule to help us through this past year, a Happy Holidays and Prosperous New Year!
Ride Safe! “Never assume malice when stupidity will suffice” PEGASUS PFI-V FUEL INJECTION TECH QUESTION–Checked out Pegasus PFI-V. How are they goin to deal with the Twin Cam engine?? There is a big market for a replacement for the Magnelli Morelli H-D used from 95 to 2001. It’s junk. Always has been from day one. Zippers, I think is the only one offering a update. They offer a Delphi conversion upgrade. Nice, but very pricey. So, my point is think many of those old junk H-D EFI systems are out there. Lot’s of them. Your thoughts? –Pablo Within 60 days the Pegasus crew will have fuel injection systems for Twin Cam carb and Fuel injected models.–Wrench LIFESTYLE CYCLES HOLIDAY HOURS AND DEALS OF THE WEEK— 2002 HARLEY DAVIDSON FAT BOYLOW MILES!ONLY $10,995.00 2006 THUNDER MOUNTAIN STERLING103″ Screamin’ Eagle,ONLY $17,995.00 SPEND $100 AND GET A FREE $10.00LIFESTYLE CYCLES GIFT CARD!That’s right! Spend $100 at LifeStyle Cycles between now and 3:00 PM Christmas Eve and you’ll get a $10.00 Gift Card ABSOLUTELY FREE! Spend $200, and get TWO Gift Cards! How many Gift Cards would you like? –LIFESTYLE CYCLES JUST A QUICK REMINDER THAT TIME IS RUNNING OUT ON ORDERING AND SHIPPING FOR CHRISTMAS– SCOTT JACOBS HOLIDAY SPECIALS Wednesday, Dec.19 is the final day to place your order so if you are still deciding on a gift for that special someone, keep in mind the options below. (or click on the link next to my phone # to view the entire collection of Scott Jacobs’ works). It’ that time of year again and to show our appreciation for all our A-list collectors we have come up with a Holiday Special that is truly extraordinary. If you are planning a gift for that “person who has everything” or have been “thinking about” a new Scott Jacobs’ work, this may be just what the doctor ordered. The deal is simple: purchase any Scott Jacobs’ artwork of your choice, framed or unframed, and select a second piece of equal or lesser value at a thirty percent (30%) discount. It is an opportunity to take care of both yourself and someone close to you with a timeless gift for Christmas. A second option would get you a beautifully framed limited edition canvas for FREE. Included with any purchase of a large canvas will be your choice of the smaller version (framed of course) of two of the most popular images of Scott’s career: Shaken not Stirred & After the Ride (see below; VALUE $750) Click on the link at the bottom of this page for our complete catalogue of works including the recent and almost sold-out Marilyn Merlot: LADIES IN WAITING: Cheers, EMPLOYEES ESCAPE OCC–With everyone complaining, the custom market and the Harley market are down and very tough to survive in right now, one would wonder whom and why would anyone take a gamble and enter into this downward spiraling market. As you can imagine to become successful you would need to have a variety of resources, notoriety, exposure and experience to even think about launching into this small niche market. That is exactly what Vinnie Di Martino and Cody Connelly have going for them. Famous for their contributions to the TLC American Chopper series they have moved on and are now the proud creators and owners of V-FORCE CUSTOMS. Cody was the first employee of OCC when the show took to the airways. Being there over six years and Vinnie over 5 years, they both have a great deal of hands on experience and notoriety. ?We are looking forward to getting out in the shop and doing what we love and do best. The past couple months have been mostly setting up the office and legal work,? Cody comments. Vinnie adds, ?We do have a website up and running which is doing very well receiving over 2,000 unique visitors each day. Cody and I try to post comments and upload videos on a daily basis.? In addition, Cody explained that the website is the outlet for their clothing line and have sold their first run of 1,000-signed T-shirts. Cody explained the freshly painted epoxy floors are dry and the new equipment is starting to arrive everyday. You can visit their website VForceCustoms.com and take a virtual tour of their new shop and you can even leave them a comment. ?We plan on being at 2008 Bike Week in Daytona with or without a bike. We plan to at least come out and offer our hats and T-shirts,? says Vinnie. I wish the two of you well and much success and look forward to see your first creation under the V-FORCE CUSTOMS name. — By JEFF BARTUCCI INCREDIBLE NEWS–Talk about ups and downs, and tech stuff mixed with Holiday emotions. I?m not sure where to go from here. Christmas is just a handful of days away and I?m scrambling to set goals for Bonneville in ?09, to dial in the bike and ship it to Colonel Wardlaw in Alabama for tuning then a trip to Cincinnati in February (’08) and Daytona in March. I should be holding Sin Wu?s hand in front of a fire, while discussing my next Tattoo with my son? Wait, back up. I should be conferring with my son about my grandkids? education. That?s more like it, but actually we?ll shoot the shit about my grandson going to jail for smokin? dope, my new tattoo, the next party, Sin Wu?s affair with another woman and the Nyla?s Root Beer bobber by Kent at Luck Devil?s. There’s just never enough time in a day. I swear, the code for next year is fewer project, and I just started another one, a new Panhead motorcycle desk. Where’s the Jack? Hey, tomorrow we start shipping out the Bikernet Stocking stuffers; all 50 of them. Hang on! This is your last chance to sign-up. What the hell, it’s free and you’ll be blown away when you open the gift box. Just click on the logo below. Ride Forever, –Bandit
–Carl (Cj) Hanlon
Guilty Customs, LLC
407.453.0844
December 24th: 9-3
JDecember 25th: closed
December 26th: 9-6
December 31st: closed
New Year’s Day: closed
January 2nd: 9-6
1534 N. State College Blvd.
Anaheim, CA 92806
(714) 490-0155
–Ron Copple
Scott Jacobs Studio
303-431-4453
www.scottjacobsstudio.com