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Editor’s Note: We’ve stared at wonderful boobs with longing and allure all our lives. We’ve become aroused by the sight of tender nipples showing through a shear blouse. We could be in the worst imaginable conditions, on a sinking ship, in a blizzard or a war zone, and the sight and notion of touching the

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THE CHARMIN REVOLUTION OF HUMAN RECTAL HYGIENIC DE-FECALATIAL BUTTOCKSICAL PROTOCOLS

Science, Technology and the American Advertising Industry Saving the Earth, the Forest and your Butthole, one Sheet of Shit-Paper at a time. Charmin toilet paper has boldly altered the perforations that separate one “sheet” from the next, changing them from straight-line perforations, an example of which would graphically look like this, into CURVED perforations, resulting

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