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BIKERNET CARIBBEAN REPORT–I’m not a sports fan, but the Anaheim Angels and Expos were playing here this week and we went over to see what all the hoopla was about. I have never seen so many home runs, the Expos has taken two beatings, so if anyone out there in the LA area was watching the ball game and imagined that you saw us, you are probably right, nope it was not the pipe. That got me thinking, and you know how it is, thinking means, news or trouble… So here we go.
This guys are making millions of dollars to play a game, stuff that we all used to do (or still do) for fun, and no one considers them sellouts.
Then they do all the ads and endorsements which even bring ’em more money. No one bitches about these guys being ” untrue” to their game. So why do we? If any of us goes major, the whole spectrum changes. It’s not a “real” whatever, he sold out his soul to the TV devil…..
I received an e-mail from some retard claiming that I could not be talking about true bikers, or real bikes, since I was from PR and this island was as far from the chopper world as you could be, and we had no history of choppers or bikes. Well, I think I’ve got a surprise for everyone. I’m starting to document the whole History of Harley-Davidson and choppers in Puerto Rico, and I am getting so much material it’s going to be pretty impressive.
But this brings me to more thoughts…. Maybe, just maybe, I should have been born in England to become a soccer star…. I guess no one told the people of Brazil that their team, who once again got a World Cup, don’t know shit about soccer. Or maybe I should have been born in Hawaii to be a professional surfer. I’ll tell you this much. The conditions in Oahu are perfect to become a world champion. It’s the best surfing backyard in the world, but I guess no one told a kid from Florida (which has kinda the suckiest waves) and has won 6 World championships. Or maybe I need to be been born in Newport , Rhode Island to compete for the America’s Cup, the most prestigious sailing regatta in the planet. Shit, I think someone forgot to warn the Swiss (which by the way have no SEA) when they won the cup. No one told the poor kids in Dominican Republic that by playing with a broom stick and tennis ball, they might become a major part of the biggest American pass time, baseball. Yep, Sammy Sosa, cork and all.
Shall I keep on going? Don’t think so. It’s got nothin’ to do with your place of origin, but all in the desire, the hard work, the hours you put into your endeavor. But one thing is for sure, all you gotta do is keep your eyes open, know what is going on around you (and I mean all around, not just in your “backyard”). That way you can achieve things that are not achievable. I don’t have to brag about what I have been able to do, but I’m pretty happy with it, and that’s good enough for me (which is what matters). We as human beings refuse to sit down and enjoy the view. We need to keep on going, create more, practice more and better ourselves. In short the day that we don’t accomplish diddly squat is a total waste. In China, Russia or Hell…..Life deals the cards, and you play them as best you can. Life can’t be bluffed.Nuff said.
Let’s get to the news…
Last weekend there was an overdose of motorcycle TV shows. Every channel had something different, from Arlen Ness and the Hamsters, to Bonneville, Sturgis, Myrtle Beach and the repeats of the Biker Build Offs, Motorcycle Women and the Jesse James shows. Even the Orange County Osbournes and more Monster Garage with no others than Indian Larry and Steve Bonge from NYC.This is fucking amazing! It’s so great for the industry of motorcycling in general that channels like Discovery, TLC, the History channel and Travel Channel were up to the wazoos in Motorcycle stuff. We are being noticed and noticed big time, I just hope that all these shows remember that there’s a big ass World out there….A lot to see and film… I wish this will all come in due time.
Our plans for Hawaii are a go. I have been talking to various friends about this show. I know it’s just a single day event, but it’s a pretty good excuse for a well deserved vacation to just hang out and surf with friends. Also I would like to get a first look at the scene in Hawaii, and share it with all that don’t or won’t have the chance to see it first hand. I am sure it will be a blast.
I talked to Chris T the other day and Billy Lane is going for sure, we are trying to get JJ to come as well, why ? Cause we are friends and we surf…And if you surf, Hawaii is the place. Chris was telling me about a possible photo shoot of us surfing for one of the magazines. That would be super cool and totally odd. After 25 or so years battling waves, being featured on a surf mag as a bike builder who surfs….That would be fuckin’ cool.
As we speak the biggest bike event in Sweden is taking place. I hate to say I had to skip it after promising my friends I would go… What the fuck! I don’t have that much time, but I still wanted to head over really bad…
Last week we went over to our friends Fiel a la Vega concert. I dare to say the top Spanish speaking rock band ever. Those guys played for three hours and outdid themselves, no pun intended. Those fuckers ROCKED! If you have the chance check them out, or visit their page www.fielalavega.com. It’s in Spanish, but music knows no language. We had a blast, and the best of the best in PR hot chicks were there…..Sight to be seen. Long live low cut denim, Levi’s Strauss was a genius.
The bikes are rolling on and the building still at a frantic pace, we are getting ready for the Horse Smoke out, the Run for Breath trophies, Hawaii Chopper Show and Sturgis… It’s all around the corner… Welcome to fucking Summer !!!!Gotta go check my new surf boards being made…..See you guys later
–Jose, Caribbean Bikernet reporter
HOLLYWOOD– Sources confirm a new reality series headed for cableaudiences this summer will feature the witty hijinks of E! network starAnna Nicole, last seen ordering her lawyer/indentured servant Howard Stern(no, not that Howard Stern) to fish out her favorite lipstick after it was”accidentally” dropped in the upstairs toilet, and Discovery Channel’sOrange County Choppers styling whiz Paul Teutul, Jr. Anna’s command to,”Just reach in there and grab it! Go on! Do it!” is seen as a perfect foilto the more reflective and stoic Teutul.
According to anonymous sources, a separate Pay Per View site, offered byWWF maven Vince McMahon as part of his groundbreaking “Salute To America’sBravest!”, will allow curious voyeurs an “all areas” access to view thebedroom antics of the two “porking” in a wide tire converted ’70’s-retrowater bed, complete with replica surface-to-air missles, faux tarantulafangs, armadillo upholstery, velvet-lined handcuff restraints, theatricalfireworks on demand, and a “chromed out” flavored condom dispenser mountedon the headboard right between the exam stirrups.
The two reigning icons of dysfunctional genetics promise to set tongues towagging when they debut a Frederick’s commissioned line of “barely there”accessories and clothing separates designed for the “hefty leather” setwhose needs require versatile outfits equally at home on the golf course orin the biker bar, and which for obvious reasons are prohibited from beingshown on the Style Network. The breakthrough designs, a blend of Pakistanicowhide, “distressed” Chinese chain, and Dutch rough trade inverted spikesand smooth latex, will rollout nationally following the premier, availableboth online and at selected retail locations.
Though not yet confirmed, the new series will likely debut as, “Yo! Yo! Yo!Get To Work Or Get Your Stupid Ass Slapped, Dummy!” The previous workingtitle, “Bowling For Bitches,” was dropped as being not sufficientlyexpressive.
Sources familiar with the inaugaral episode state that the OCC motorcyclesseen on air range in price from $750,000 to $4.5 million, depending oncustomer choices for paint and displacement. Most have already been soldand are pending delivery, although OCC is currently accepting orders for2008 delivery.
–from John S.
PRISON GUARD SEX–By STEVEN WALTERS On a voice vote, the state Senate passed the bill, sending it to Gov. Jim Doyle, who will sign it into law, an aide said. The Assembly unanimously passed the measure in April. Wisconsin had been one of only four states not explicitly prohibiting sexual conduct between prison and jail staff members and inmates. “We think it’s wonderful news,” said Lara Stemple, executive director of Stop Prisoner Rape, a national human rights organization. “We agree corrections officers should not be allowed to engage in sexual acts with prisoners. We think this legislation is needed to keep that from happening.” Martin Beil, executive director of the Wisconsin State Employees Union, could not be reached for comment. In the past, union officials argued it was enough punishment if guards who had sexual contact with inmates lost their jobs for that conduct, so it was not necessary to also make that a crime. But Fitzgerald said publicity over an incident at the Taycheedah prison for women, in which inmate Jackie Noyes was impregnated by a prison guard overseeing her – and the inmate was ordered to serve nearly a year of solitary confinement – also helped the bill pass. The guard, Matthew Emery, was fired. The Journal Sentinel reported that Noyes was one of four female inmates placed in solitary confinement for having a personal relationship with guards overseeing them or for trying to report sexual misconduct. All four were released from solitary after the newspaper articles were published. –Rogue 
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