March 9, 2003

SUNDAY POST MADNESS–KING WORK, V-ROD MODS AND SEX

brenda

Last night and this morning reminded me why we fight for freedom and a smile. Each minute reminded me why I love women and the hell we go through for them. I danced down the yellow brick road once more.

Then ships horns awoke me, beside her, this morning. The long lingering, haunting blast announced the fog on the harbor. When one blast is followed by another, from another ship, I become concerned. It’s as if lost children, unable to see their parents, are calling out for help. I rolled over and she slipped into my arms again. A comforting, welcoming embrace during treacherous times.

bikini shot
Then it dawned on me that Markus Cuff, the photographer, was due to show up at 11:00 a.m. along with Nuttboy. We have an American Rider tech to complete on the King. I spoke to Frank Kaisler from Daytona this morning. More rain destroyed bike week. Attendance is down 40 percent. Lots of money lost and wasted. We better get to the news. I’m burnin’ daylight:

duck tape

Note to Homeland Security, “The duck’s taped. What’s next?”

The War Report

SEC.STATE Colin Powell was recently approached by an Iraqi newspaper reporter and accusingly asked, “Isn’t it true that only 13 percent of young Americans can locate Iraq on a map?”

Secretary Powell stopped, turned, and stated “Yes, it’s true. But, unfortunately for you, all 13 percent are United States Marines.”

–from Bob T.

old photo

Sunday Farming Report

A mouse looked through a crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife opening a package. What food might it contain? He was aghast to discover that it was a mouse trap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning: “There is a mouse trap in the house, there is a mouse trap in the house.

“The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, “Mr. Mouse, I can see this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it.”

The mouse turned to the pig and told him, “There is a mouse trap in the house.”

“I am so very sorry Mr. Mouse,” sympathized the pig, “but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured that you are in my prayers.”

The mouse turned to the cow. She said, “Like wow, Mr. Mouse. A mouse trap. I’m in grave danger? Duh?”

So the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected to face the farmer’s mouse trap alone.

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house, like the sound of a mouse trap catching its prey. The farmer’s wife rushed to see what was caught.

In the darkness, she did not see that it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer’s wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital. She returned home with a fever.

Now everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup’s main ingredient.

His wife’s sickness continued so that friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

The farmer’s wife unfortunately did not get well. She died, and so many people came for her funeral the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide meat for all of them to eat.

So the next time you hear that someone is facing a problem and think that it does not concern you, remember that when the least of us is threatened, we are all at risk.

AND THAT’S WHY WE ARE GOING TO WAR!!!!!

–from Rev CarlR

vrod right

Carolina V-Rod

Here is the V-Rod stuff. Do you like our version of the relocating the license plate and turn signals?

Wheel’s and rear pulley are the Monaco’s from PM. Bike was lowered using the Dyna lowering shocks. Exhaust is S.E. Lot’s of chrome from the P&A H-D accessory book.

The bike could use some powder coating here and there, a bit more detailing. Wha’da you think??

–Pablo

PM wheels

PM Wheels For 2003

For 2003, PM is releasing 3 entirely new wheel designs. The Vader is a throwback to the origins of custom motorcycle wheels with a major update in technology! This clean and subtle wheel will look at home on a retro chopper as well as a modern bagger. The Gatlin is an entirely fresh design that seems to defy all previous perception of what can be carved from aluminum. The spokes burst from the hub into a web before splitting into individual talons and meeting the rim. Finally the Hooligan is a study in machined aluminum detailing. Each spoke shows more depth and contours as it emerges from the hub.

As with all Performance Machine products, the 2003 wheels have been subjected to rigorous testing to ensure a high quality, long lasting product. Design matched discs, pulley and sprocket are available to complete the distinctive look. Polished or chrome plated wheels are offered in a variety of sizes to fit your bike!

For more information, call or write to:
Performance Machine, Inc.
6892 Marlin Circle,
La Palma, CA 90623
714-523-3000
http://www.performancemachine.com

WHY MEN ARE NOT SECRETARIES…

Husband’s note on refrigerator to his wife:

Someone from the Guyna Colleges called. They said the Pabst beer is normal.

I didn’t know you liked beer.

–from Rev CarlR

Sunday Political Views

The last 4 ex-US Presidents are caught in a tornado, and off they spin to OZ. They finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the Great Wizard.

“WHAT BRINGS YOU BEFORE THE GREAT WIZARD OF OZ?”

Jimmy Carter steps forward timidly:” I’ve come for some courage.”

“NO PROBLEM!” says the Wizard. “WHO IS NEXT?”

Ronald Reagan steps forward, “Well. . . I.. think I need a brain.”

“DONE” says the Wizard.

“WHO COMES NEXT BEFORE THE GREAT AND POWERFUL OZ?”

Up steps George Bush sadly, “I’m told by the American people that I need a heart,” — “I’VE HEARD IT’ S TRUE!” says the Wizard. “CONSIDER IT DONE.”

There is a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there, looking around, but doesn’t say a word.

Irritated, the Wizard finally asks, “WHAT DO YOU WANT?” “Is Dorothy here?”

–from Rev CarlR

Harley Davidson Banner

H-D Resources For 100th

The best resource for 100th anniversary info.(all activities to take place in Milwaukee) is www.harley-davidson.com. Please check out the following link: http://www.harley-davidson.com/an/100/en/anniversary.asp?locale=en_US&bmLocale=en_US

Housing: http://www.harley-davidson.com/AN/100/CEL/en/celebration.asp?bmLocale=en_US

Pls. click on, “Where to bed down for the night” right hand side of your screen. Then, you will see a pop up window regarding Mega Housing; the agency that is taking reservations for rooms.

blacked tail area

BACK TO THE GARAGE–

As you can see, we’re making headway with the King, except for my incessant fuck-ups. For instance, I assembled and torqued the right fork leg in place only to discover that I hadn’t installed the damn fork boot. Had to take it all apart again.

Watch next week for more on Daytona, a couple of new bike features, and sex-ridden Buckshot fiction. We just wrapped up a Crusing Rider editorial and are planning another road test, but I won’t mention the bike under consideration.

Now, where’s that woman who makes me forget deadlines and war efforts. She causes me to smile at an empty checkbook and look forward to sundowns.

Better get to the garage.

fork boot

–Bandit

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