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I HATE OLD FOLKS JOKES– An elderly couple, Sam and Bessie, are “snowbirds” in Arizona.Sam always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots.Seeing some on sale one day, he buys them, wears them home,walking proudly. He walks into the house and says to his wife,”Notice anything different about me?”
Bessie looks him over, “Nope.”
Frustrated Sam storms off into the bathroom, undresses, andwalks back into the room completely naked except for the boots.Again he asks, a little louder this time, “Notice anything differentNOW?”
Bessie looks up and says, “Sam, what’s different? It’s hangingdown today, it was hanging down yesterday, and it’ll be hangingdown again tomorrow.”
Furious, Sam yells, “AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT’SHANGING DOWN BESSIE?!IT’S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT’S LOOKING ATMY NEW BOOTS!”
To which Bessie replies,”Shoulda bought a hat Sam….ya shoulda bought a hat.”
–from Chris T.
ANTIQUE BIKE DEALS OF THE WEEK–I have a lead for you on 2 OHV peashooters,1926 & 1929, in Oregon. The guys name is Mike,503-655-5428.www.antiquemotorcycleworks.com
–krash.
ATLAS COYOTE–SPORTSTER AND BUELL FRAME–The COYOTE is a stretched frame for Sportster powerplants ’79 to present. The Coyote comes with a 3- inch top-tube stretch, straight top tube for custom tank applications, 4 or 5 speed transmission mounts, stroker motor clearance, any degree of neck rake and any stretch dimension. Has a boxed tail section, and will accept up to an 8-inch (200 tire) wide rear tire (belt or chain drive).
The Atlas Coyote frame kit includes: boxed tail section, aluminum top motor-mount plate, front motor mount, billet aluminum rear motor mount, FXST style oil-tank mount, sissy-bar fender brace mounting bungs, fender mounts, bung type brake anchor tab for universal mount and 1 rear axle section for Buell. The Atlas Coyote Sportster rigid frame CUSTOM kit features: Custom axle adjusters, chromemoly rear axle kit (3/4-inch diameter) chrome neck bearing cups, polished stainless fork stops, and polished stainless steel motor-case protector.
Options: Atlas Sportster style oil tank with or without wings.
Tell ’em Bikernet sent ya: http://www.atlasprecision.com/
HELL RAISERS SPRINGER FRONT ENDS– Here is a pic of the new springer front end. We won’t release this on our site until we have them on our shelves.
–Rene
CHICKEN STORY–Zebediah was in the fertilized-egg business.He had several hundred young layers, called pullets, and eight or tenroosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs.
Zeb kept records, and any rooster that didn’t perform well went intothe souppot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of Zeb’s time; so, Zeb gota setof tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had adifferenttone so that Zeb could tell, from a distance, which rooster wasperforming.
Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simplybylistening to the bells.Zeb’s favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was,too. Buton this particular morning, Zeb noticed that Brewster’s bell had notrung atall! Zeb went to investigate.
The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing! The pullets,hearingthe roosters coming, would run for cover. BUT, to Zeb’s amazement,Brewsterhad his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t ring. He’d sneak up on apullet, dohis job and walk on to the next one.
Zeb was so proud of Brewster that he entered him in the county fair.Brewsterwas an overnight sensation. The judges not only awarded him the No BellPiecePrize but also the Pulletsurprise.
(Old age and treachery wins again)!
–Rogue
BAYLEE (Poem From Your Daddy)–
Baylee My Daughter To Be
I Wish I Could
Hold You Now
I Need That So Bad
You Will Help Daddy
In So Many Ways
Teach Me To Laugh
Give Me The Childhood
I Never Had
Show Me How
To Enjoy The SImple Things
Jumping In Mud Puddles
Smelling Pretty Weeds
Chasing Lightning bugs
When You Get Here
My Life Will
Completely Change
I Can’t Promise
To Be The Best
Daddy A Girl
Could Ask For
But I Promise To
Be There For You
Day And Night
Your Daddy WIll
Never Be To Busy
To See Everything
You See
I Love You More
With Each ‘Lil Heart Beat
Unconditional Love
That Only A Daddy
Can Give
God Blessed Me
The Day He Gave
You To Me
Written By Panhead Josh And Dedicated to Baylee Brunetta Griffith MyDaughter to be.
NEW FROM JOKER MACHINE–Introducing the ultimate in supplemental lighting for those who want to give their bike added Safety-With-Style.These all billet lights feature 8 Red-Output L.E.D.’s hidden beneath a clear prismatic polycarbonate lens and has no external visable color until light is activated.
MAIN FEATURES
? Two Stage L.E.D.’s (for brake and running light use.)
? Simple to install…….using your existing rear foot peg mounting holes, and includes bushing for use of either 1/2″ or 3/8″ dia. mounting bolts.
? May be wired in conjuction with your existing taillight’s running and stop lights easily.
? Top grade CNC machining, polishing and chroming is evident throughtout the contruction of these units.
? Although compact in size, the eight L.E.D.’s really “pack-a-punch” when turned on!.
LED Peg Mount Marker Lights (pair)$149.95
QUOTE OF THE DAY–“Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.”
…H.L. Mencken
–from Rev CarlR
TAKE TIME FOR 9/11–Take a minute to ponder 9/11 and the folks who died. Remember the efforts we’ve made to kick ass world wide and what it will mean to the future of freedom–that is if they don’t take all our freedoms in the process. I wish all our fighting brothers and sisters the very best.
The old true Jesse James stopped by today. He’s a custom painter, neon sign maker, fabricator and bike builder. He was a member of the Monks MC years ago and still wanders the streets of Los Angeles looking for direction. He’s building the Bikernet Headquarters a neon tribute to the 5-Ball. We’ll report as it comes together.
Tomorrow we’ll post the build on a sharp custom bike from Oahu. Wait until you see the detailed shots of a show winning custom bike come together. Above is just a small example of his delicate creative abilities. Hang on.
This weekend we may pinstripe the 1928 Shovel and install the mid controls on the Amazing Shrunken FXR. We ordered our cables from Barnetts and hydraulic lines from Goodrich. It may burn San Pedro pavement by the end of the month.
I’ll do my damnest to launch another line of new H-D models over the weekend. Have a helluva weekend.
Ride Forever,
–Bandit
