September 19, 2002 Part 4

BIKERNET NEWS FLASH–BIKERS ALLOWED TO WEAR COLORS TO COURT, BIKERNET WORST DRINK AND NEW DEUCE

Continued From Page 3

SCREAMIN’ EAGLE DEUCE IS CUSTOM TIMES TWO–It’s Deuces Wild

In designing the Screamin’ Eagle Deuce, Harley-Davidson CVO sought to accentuate the long, low custom style of the Softail Deuce. A lowered front and rear suspension was installed, along with a front spoiler and a custom low-profile seat and pillion with chrome inserts. The bike rides on chrome slotted six-spoke wheels with a 21-inch front and a 17-inch rear. Special Centennial Gold and Vivid Black paint is detailed with 23K gold leaf graphics, and the frame and swingarm, air cleaner, timer, derby cover and fuel tank console inserts are color-matched in Centennial Gold.

The 2003 Screamin Eagle Deuce is the first Softail model to be the subject of a CVO project. Established in 1999, Harley-Davidson?s CVO program has produced low-volume, custom motorcycles using a handpicked team of technicians on a special assembly line at the Harley-Davidson plant in York, Pa. Approximately 3000 units of the 2003 Screamin’ Eagle Deuce will be produced.

SISTER MARY KATHERINE ENTERED THE MONASTERY OF SILENCE– The Priest said, “Sister, this is a silent monastery. You are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so.”

Sister Mary Katherine lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Priest said to her, “Sister Mary Katherine, you have been here for 5 years. You can speak two words.”

Sister Mary Katherine said, “Hard bed.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” the Priest said, “We will get you a better bed.” After another 5 years, Sister Mary Katherine was called by the Priest. “You may say another two words, Sister Mary Katherine.”

“Cold food, “said Sister Mary Katherine, and the Priest assured her that the food would be better in the future.

On her 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Priest again called Sister Mary Katherine into his office. “You may say two words today.”

“I quit,” said Sister Mary Katherine.

“It’s probably best”, said the Priest, “You’ve done nothing but bitch since you got here.”

–from Jill Z.

Ray's Softail

BIKERNET AUSTRALIAN CONNECTION BUYS 2003 SOFTAIL– “My new 2003 Anniversary Softail arrived today. TALK ABOUT A HARD-ON!!!!!”

–Ray Russell

FROM THE BIKERNET SCIENTIFIC DEPARTMENT–GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN ????Between 18 and 20 a woman is like Africa,half discovered, half wild, naturally beautifulwith fertile deltas.

Between 21 and 30 a woman is like America,well developed and open to tradeespecially for someone with cash.Between 31 and 35 she is like India, veryhot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.Between 36 and 40 a woman is like France.Gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50 she is like Yugoslavia,lost the war, haunted by past mistakes.Reconstruction is now necessary.

Between 51 and 60, she is like Russia,very wide and borders are unpatrolled.The frigid climate keeps people away.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Mongolia,has a glories and all conquering past, but no future.

After 70, they become Afghanistan. Mosteveryone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN

Between 15 and 80 a man is like Iraq – ruledby a dick.

–from Kevin R.

FEDERAL COURT RULES BIKER COLORS OKAY IN NEVADA COURTHOUSE– A Carson City courthousedress code that prohibits biker “colors” is unconstitutional, a federal appeals courtruled on Monday, August 26th, overturning a Northern Nevada judge’s ruling and findingthat motorcyclists can wear “biker colors,” even those with swastikas, inside thecourthouse.

For the whole story and more legislative headlines, check the Bikers Rights department of Bikernet.

AIRPORT SECURITY– Airport Security Almost 150 years ago, President Lincoln found it necessary to hire aprivate investigator – Alan Pinkerton – for protection. That was the beginning ofthe Secret Service. Since that time federal police authority has grown to alarge number of multi-letter agencies – FBI, CIA, INS, IRS, DEA, BATF, etc.

Now comes the “Federal Air Transportation Airport Security Service.”Can’t you see them now, these highly trained men and women in their blackoutfits with their initials in large white letters across their backs: “FATASS.” I feel safer already.

–from Thomas Conley

BIKERNET TERRORIST REPORT– Osama bin Laden, not feeling well and concerned about his mortality, goes to consult a psychic about the date of his death. Closing her eyes and silently reaching into the realm of the future she finds the answer. “You will die on an American holiday.”

“Which one?” Osama bin Laden asks nervously.

“It doesn’t matter,” replied the psychic. “Whenever you die, it will be an American holiday!”

–from Catts

RIP Kenneth Robert Howard ~AKA ~ Von Dutch
Born 1929 – Died September 19, 1992—
Pinstriping on cars and motorcycles was a dead art when 15-yr. old KennyHoward went to work in George Beerup’s motorcycle shop in the mid-forties.The last automobile striping on an American car was done by General Motorsin 1938. Then, in the mid-fifties, customizers brought it back in style inmostly radical form believing they were doing something entirely new! Kenny,the motorcycle mechanic was the man who started this “new” vogue under thename “Von Dutch.”

Dutch lived life hard. His bad habits eventually caught up with him, andhe developed a stomach abscess. He didn’t like doctors, but towards the end,the pain got so bad, he finally saw a doctor. By then it was too late. Dutchdied on the 19th of September, 1992.

In the next few days, we’ll have a full article on Von Dutch from one ofhis best friends, Bob Burns. Stay tuned.

BIKERNET SITE OF THE WEEK–About Harley five-speeds you must visit www.twistgear.net.We’re getting more and more positive reaction to the helical approach totranny gearsets. I’m adding content weekly, and will be for awhile, as wellas figuring out and refining the site itself.

Brand New! is SportGear, developed primarily for Buells but also fine forSportys. Info is still being collected, but anything relevant will eventuallyfind it’s way to the site. IronWorks is our second pub to do an install,December issue, and Ozbike just got their kit for install in the shop mule,a ’95 Road King.

We got a 2/3 page mention in last year’s Power and Performance, but itdidn’t really translate into anything consumers could make a judgementwith.

-JS

BIKERNET WORST DRINK AWARD–The most horrible drink to be considered a beverage and safely drunkis Khoona. It is drunk by Afghani tribesmen on their wedding night andconsists of a small amount of still-warm very recently attained bull semen.It is believed to be a potent aphrodisiac.

–from Ray Russell

Jose ER

WIDE SCREEN FILM FESTIVAL– Special Guest: Peter Fonda! – Easy Rider – WideScreen Film Festival!!! California Harley-Davidson/BuellProud Sponsor

Cal State University Long BeachWideScreen Film Festival!!!Featuring a WideScreen Presentation of the Classic Film:Easy Riderwith Special Guest: Peter Fonda!Tickets on Sale Now at California Harley-DavidsonFriday, October 4th6:00 to 10:00 p.m.$25.00 per person

ITINERARY:
* 5:30 p.m. Meet at California Harley-Davidson
* 6:00 p.m. Parade of bikes leave CaliforniaHarley-Davidson for CSULB
* 6:30-7:45 p.m. Dinner
* 7:55 p.m. Harley-Davidson Merchandise Raffle
* 8:00-10:00 p.m. Easy Rider screening/Q&A withPeter Fonda ?

Date of Event “Friday October 4th” – Tickets on Sale Now at California Harley-DavidsonOnly $25.00 per person – Tickets are limited !! ?

IT’S A WRAP–One comment though, before I head to the garage to tinker with the Road King. I received a clipping in the mail from a local paper. It was a citizen complaining in a letter to the editor about loud bikes in a restaurant district. I’m going to respond, and when you notice this shit do the same. This is a free country. There’s a lot of shit I don’t like, but I keep my mouth shut for that reason. If someone acts like a jackass, I’ll take it up with them not the cops, the newspaper or politcians. If some bastard wants to go out in public, he needs to deal with what the public has to offer not run to snitch everyone off. Look at what we are doing to one another. Kids can’t ride skateboards, people can’s smoke, we can’t make noise. Gimme a break. What’s next?

That’s it. Get involved, fight back and I’ll jump right down from the soap box, take another pain pill and chase that chick down the hall.

Ride Forever,

–Bandit

Please follow and like us:
Pin Share
Scroll to Top