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THE BIKERNET DOWN-UNDER REPORT–An Australian woman was having a shower and slipped butinstead of slipping over forwards or backwards, she did the splits,and suctioned herself to the floor.
She yelled out for her husband Jacko. “Jacko! Jacko!” she yelled.Jacko came running in. “Jacko, I’ve bloody suctioned myself tothe floor,” she said.
“Strewth!” Jacko said and tried to pull her up. “You’re just tooheavy, girl. I’ll go across the road and get Bluey.” (his mate).
They came back and they both tried to pull her up.
“No way. We can’t do it,” Bluey said “Lets try Plan C.”
“Plan C?” exclaimed Jacko. “What’s that?”
“I’ll go home and get my hammer and chisel, and we’ll break thetiles under her.”
“Spot on,” Jacko said. “While you are doing that, I’ll stayhere and play with her tits.”
“Play with her tits?” Bluey said, “Why the hell would you wantto do that?”
Jacko replied “Well, I reckon if I can get her wet enough, wecan slide her into the kitchen where the tiles aren’t so expensive.”
–from Bob T.
FROM THE BIKERNET ARCHIVES–
MURDER CHARGES DROPPED IN GANG FIGHT– Prosecutors dropped murdercharges today (Sept. 19th) against a member of the Hells Angelsmotorcycle club, saying he may have been justified infiring the shot that killed a member of a rival club at aHells Angels event in February. Members of the other group,the Pagan Outlaw Motorcycle Club, had crashed the event,many of them wielding bats and other weapons.
As part of a plea agreement, the Hells Angels member,Raymond G. Dwyer, pleaded guilty to a lesser charge ofthird-degree weapons possession in connection with thefracas, which erupted at a catering hall in Plainview wherethe Long Island Hells Angels chapter had been holding amotorcycle and tattoo exposition.
“We cannot prove beyond a reasonable doubt that Mr. Dwyerwasn’t reasonably justified when he fired,” Robert T.Hayden, a Nassau County assistant district attorney, toldJudge Alan L. Honorof in Nassau County Court.
Later, Mr. Hayden explained that Mr. Dwyer could haveconvincingly claimed that he acted in self-defense when hefired five or six shots, one of which killed a 51-year-oldmember of the Pagans, Robert Rutherford of Lancaster, Pa.More than 70 members of the club had arrived at thecatering hall to confront the Hells Angels in the latestchapter in a longstanding rivalry, the authorities said.
“This group of about eight or nine Pagans was stormingthrough the front door, swinging pipes and clubs at theHells Angels,” Mr. Hayden said. “It was in that situationthat Mr. Dwyer pulled out the gun.”
Mr. Dwyer, 39, appeared in court in a dark gray suitadorned with a silver pin denoting his allegiance to theHells Angels. His brown hair was pulled back in a neatponytail and a pair of sunglasses rested on his head.
He declined to comment on the case but handed a reporter astatement praising his lawyer and supporters. “God Blessthe United States of America and God Bless the Hells AngelsMotorcycle Club,” he wrote.
His lawyer, William S. Petrillo, told the judge that “wecould literally have had hundreds of supporters here onbehalf of Mr. Dwyer,” but that he had chosen not to createsuch a scene. Instead, there were only three supporterspresent.
Mr. Petrillo said that Mr. Dwyer, a tattoo artist, did notacknowledge firing any shots, only that “whoever fired thegun obviously did so in self-defense.”
Judge Honorof agreed to sentence Mr. Dwyer to no more thanone year in the Nassau County Jail, and to postpone thatsentence until a separate case is settled. In that case,Mr. Dwyer and six other Hells Angels members were arrestedin May; the authorities said they had beaten and robbed aformer member.
The judge agreed today that if Mr. Dwyer is convicted, thesentences will run concurrently.
Most of the 73 Pagans charged in the February attack havepleaded guilty to federal racketeering-related charges. Theauthorities said the Pagans had driven to Long Island fromas far as Virginia, Delaware and Pennsylvania to confronttheir rivals.
HARLEY-DAVIDSON 100th ANNIVERSARY RIDE HOME IN AUGUST 2003– In August 2003, members of the Harley-Davidson family of riders, dealers and employees will begin riding home to Milwaukee, Wisconsin to help celebrate a century of great motorcycling. The 100th Anniversary Ride Home includes four routes across the United States that will stop in 26 cities from August 17-26, 2003.
The Ride Home is a major component of Harley-Davidson’s 100th Anniversary celebration, which helps share the passion of motorcycling with people around the world. The Harley-Davidson family has a goal of raising $5 million for the Muscular Dystrophy Association during its 100th Anniversary celebration.
Ride Home participants can choose to ride an entire route at their own pace, join along the way, or celebrate at a single community stop on the route. The four Ride Home routes are: Southwest Route from Las Vegas, Northwest Route from Portland, South Central Route from Baton Rouge, and Northeast Route from New York. The rides are free and open to the public.
“With exciting events and gathering points along each route, the Ride Home gives Harley-Davidson enthusiasts all over the country the chance to celebrate the 100th Anniversary even if they can’t make it to Milwaukee,” said Joanne Bischmann, Harley-Davidson vicepresident of marketing. “The Ride Home stops will be memorable events for local communities, and you don’t have to be a rider to attend.”
Free public events along the Ride Home routes include Rendezvous parties, festivities hosted by Harley-Davidson dealers, local street parties, and Harley-Davidson plant tours in Kansas City and York, PA. Harley-Davidson 100th Anniversary events help support the Muscular Dystrophy Association through ride sponsorships, pledges, raffles, commemorative pin sales and other fundraisers.
Additional information on the Harley-Davidson 100th Anniversary and on the Ride Home can be found at www.harley-davidson.com as it becomes available. Ride Home dates, locations and activities are subject to change.
DEVIL DOLLS DICE RUN 2002–
ST. MOM’S WORT–Plant extract that treats mom’s depression by renderingpreschoolers unconscious for up to six hours.
THE FINAL REPORT FROM OZARK ED–This whole juvee girl thing is really a man’s dream. She is so beautiful andfun to be around, but she understands the whole thing with my girl.
Shedoesn’t want to have a “boyfriend” at this point in her life, but she wants tohave fun. She has a constant stream of guys following her around trying toscore her. They are so obvious that they are trying to find that trophy girl,and they immediately scare her off with the pursuit.
I never tried to score.I told her the first time I met her that I had a girl and she couldn’t haveme. She found that different, and she isn’t scared of me. We laugh at theefforts of the hard dicks and dream up ways to frustrate them. It’s cruel funat their expense but what do I care? In the mean time, she is mine for thetaking and nobody knows. I have met my goals of getting to hit that once ortwice a week, probably for years to come. She doesn’t want me to leave mygirl, she’s not jealous, she makes no demands and she’s very discreet. I haveno clue why I have the kind of luck I do, but I ain’t bitchin.
Come on, youhave to admit, shit just goes my way. I’ll probably die a long brutalagonizing death from something, insteadof a fiery crash and burn quick death. You would think that there has to be aprice of some sort for the good fortune that I have had my whole life.
QUOTE OF THE WEAK–“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.” — Robin Williams
–from Kris B.
THAT?S IT–While the men are hard at work, I had to finish the news. They really look busy don?t they? I could be sarcastic and say ?whatta life Bandit?s got? but I?d be a hypocrite. Truth is, my life is pretty damn good playing here at the Headquarters and getting to call it work. I?m one lucky bitch and I know it.
We had to lock Lawless Lorraine up in the basement this morning. Ever since Jose threatened to come for a visit, she?s been speaking Spanish and panting like a bitch in heat, (she LOVES a man with a Spanish accent). Then when Marcus Cuff and Frank Kaisler showed up this morning, she tried to attack them. Jose better bring a bodyguard when he comes down cause we may not be able to protect him from Lorraine. Or, maybe he?d like that?.I should warn him, she?s one big Amazon woman!
Back to the ?work? going on outside. Bandit is modifying his Road King with H-D touring accessories (bite your tongue Jose), for an American Rider tech tip article; Marcus Cuff is doing the photographs. Frank Kaisler is also shooting the King project for Bikernet.
It?s a beautiful, sunny day here in San Pedro with a gentle West breeze keeping us cool. I?m off to my kickboxing class for an hour then a seriously painful stretch class for another hour. Hopefully when I get home these guys will be finished with their project and out of here so Bandit and I can relax with a Jack on the rocks & White Russian. Maybe I?ll get to practice some new moves on him!
Sin
