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HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK ALONE– Without help, the person whose heart stops beating properly and who beginsto feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losingconsciousness. However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedlyand very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough.The cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest. And a cough must be repeated about every 2 seconds without let up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.
Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the bloodcirculating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normalrhythm.
In this way, heart attack victims can get to a hospital.
–from Rochester General Hospital
SPEAKING OF DIEING HERE’S THE CHEMISTRY OF HELL ?TThe following is an actual question given on a University of Washingtonchemistry midterm. The answer by one student was so profound that theprofessor shared it with colleagues via the Internet, which is, ofcourse, ?why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question:Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law(gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or somevariant. One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So weneed to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they areleaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell,it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls areentering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the worldtoday. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member oftheir religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there are more than one ofthese ?religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we canproject that all souls go to Hell.With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number ofsouls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of thevolume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for thetemperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1 – If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which soulsenter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until allHell breaks loose.
?2 – Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase ” of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hellfreezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. TeresaBanyan during my Freshman year, that “…it will be a cold day in Hell before Isleep with you,” and take into account the fact that I still have not succeededin having sexual relations with her, then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I amsure ?that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.
The student received the only “A” given.
–from Charles L. DeFanti
SONNY BARGER TOURS EUROPE–Sonny is coming to England, 6 – 10 September, for public appearances and press interviews in London, Bournemouth, and Santa Pod raceway for the European motorcycle drag racing finals. He will be signing copies of Ridin’ High, Livin’ Free, recently published in the UK by Fourth Estate.
The following week in Germany, 13 – 16 September, he will appear in Bremen and Berlin, also visiting the US troops and families in Wiesbaden. He will be signing copies of Ridin’ High, Livin’ Free, published this week in German by Europa Verlag.
Get details of these appearances at the web site:http://sonnybarger.com/meet
There are lots of new photos of Sonny with friends and fans this summer, at Myrtle Beach, Hollister and the Black Hills Rally:http://sonnybarger.com/foto
Sonny’s Hellfire hot sauces, salsa and barbeque sauce are now available, hotter than a Harley manifold after a fast ride:http://sonnybarger.com/store
The new Sonny Barger motorcycle roadside repair kit is a handy accessory no rider should be without, and makes a great gift. The components packed into this compact nylon zippered bag will help get you back on the road:http://sonnybarger.com/store
AND THE WINNER IS—This lucky guy just won a set of K. RandallBall’s books just because he took the time to enter our drawing in theCantina. Prize Possession and Outlaw Justice aren’t even available anylonger. You could be our next lucky winner. If you’re a member of theCantina, enter the contest, If you’re not a member, JOIN NOW!!!
EDWIN DAVIDSON OF NAPLES , FL
Wanted: COPY OF PRIZE POSS. AND OUTLAW JUSTICE. GETTING TIRED OF TRYINGTO READ THEM HERE AT WORK!!!
Congratulations Edwin!
THE ROGUE REPORT–Apparently disappointed and pissed off that they were unable to locate and bust “street racers” in Houston, the city cops offered K-Mart shoppers a texas-sized Blue Light Special and hauled in everybody they could find hanging around a K-Mart parking lot. Thirteen police officials have been suspended with pay in the wake of the arrests of 273 people at a Kmart and a burger stand, allegedly for loitering and trespassing. The police chief implied that officers should have refused the order to arrest people. The head of the police union seems to think the raid on hapless bystanders was justified because there are “no loitering” signs posted in the K-Mart parking lot.
This appears to be a pretty good example of a complete absence of common sense on the part of the cops. Leadership on the scene of the debacle included two Captains, two Lieutenants and a raft of sergeants. It seems to us that a citation was the way to go in this case, but the boys in blue opted to “cuff ’em up” and haul the crowd off to Central Booking. The city is now bracing for an onslaught of well deserved lawsuits, one of which has already been filed for $100 million. So far, no reports on whether or not Homeland Security will be invoked as a defense or if the cops will simply claim this event was “for the kids.”
If you think the arrests in Houston were an isolated bit of police over-kill, wait until you read this. A New Hampshire police chief thinks his department should be permitted to seize a college dorm under the state’s forfeiture law because drugs were found there. He claims the dorm comes under the “Crack House” law. Good grief!
For the entire story see Biker’s Rights on Bikernet.
Here’s another treasure that will be carefully placed in the Digital Discovery Departmet of Bandit’s Cantina. This was shot of a 1930s Excelsior-Henderson new model brochure
STEEL MENTOR REVIEW–Just read “The Steel Mentor” in the Cantina. You hit the mark with that one. Most of the people riding today have know concept of the Old Way’s.?It is great to be making the money the builders, fabricators, and mechanics make nowadays. Shit my old buddies who were my inspiration never made half of what I make today. They did it cuz it was as you say in “their blood”. One in particular Doug “Boo Boo” Reiter left this world in ’78. A true Bro, dearly missed.
It all boils down to ego I guess. The ones who bitch about the guys?making it good now are just jealous about their success. That’s how I see it. You don’t always have to like what’s being done or made today. You can, however, appreciate one’s talent and workmanship.?Sometimes?just the thought process behind a idea for a project is beyond cool.
One thing I have noticed?over the years in building bikes and cars–it’s pretty rare to see something?that hasn’t been done before. When you do see original stuff, you know it immediately!! It leaves you saying “To cool for school”.
Great piece, as always keep it up.
–Paul
TRES COWBOYS–Three cowboys are sitting around a campfire, out on the lonesome prairie,each with the bravado for which they are famous. A night of tall talesbegins.
The guy from Montana says, “I must be the strongest, meanest, toughestcowboy there is. Why, just the other day, a bull got loose in the corraland gored six men before I wrestled it to the ground by the horns withmy bare hands and castrated that sucker with my teeth.”
The guy from Wyoming couldn’t stand to be bested. “That’s nothing, I waswalking down the trail yesterday and a fifteen foot rattler slid out fromunder a rock and made a move for me. I grabbed that snake with my barehands, bit its head off and sucked the poison down in one gulp. And I amstill here today!”
The Texas cowboy remained silent, slowly stirring the coals with his cock.
–from Montana Jill
Tattoo Of The Week–This pic is of a beautiful unknown woman, sentto us by Katmandu in Florida. I love the Japanese traditional styletattoos, don’t you? Lately we haven’t been getting any submissions for the Tattoo OfThe Week; maybe everyone thinks we’re not doing it anymore. Well, we wouldif you guys would SEND US SOME PICTURES! Come on people, send your tattooimages to sinwu@bikernet.com and make me look good by giving me something tocontribute. Everyone thinks I just play with Bandit all day and don’t work. That’s particially true but with his appetite, sometimes it’s an all day session!
Sin
DARWIN AWARD WINNER– Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell ofa gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building extinguishing allpotential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc. After the building hadbeen evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched.
Uponentering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in thedark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses laterdescribed the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket andretrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation ofthe lighter like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending piecesof it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but thelighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. His peers had neverthought of the technician suspected of causing the blast as ‘bright’.
–from Rogue
BARNES REBOUNDS TO VICTORY AT POCONO BUELL LIGHTNING RACE–Bemisderfer Second, Regain Series Points Lead.Long Pond, PA (August 25, 2002) – Bouncing back from two consecutive DNFs, Michael Barnes rode his Kosco Harley-Davidson/Buell-Innovative Motorcycle Research entry to a decisive victory in the Formula USA Buell Lightning Series, presented by Buell Pro Series Accessories, at Pocono Raceway.
After dominating the Buell Lightning Series early in the season, Barnes fell victim to an accident at Mosport and a thrown chain at Road America. Failing to score points at either event, Barnes slipped back to third place in the points standings behind Clint Brotz of Hal?s Harley-Davidson and Brian Bemisderfer of Harley-Davidson of Frederick. After qualifying was fogged out at Pocono, the three riders found themselves at the front of the starting grid based on season points. Barnes lead from the start and when the race was red-flagged after nine laps on the 2.5-mile course, finished 8.0 seconds ahead of his new stablemate David Estok, with Hal?s rider Richie Morris a distant third place. However, following the race Estok and Morris were each penalized for exceeding the 95-horsepower limit, which bumped Bemisderfer up to second place in the official results. Jason Smith of Smith Brothers Harley-Davidson/Buell was moved up to third place.
?It?s great to get a win and get back on track in the points race,? said Barnes. ?I just put my head down and rode as hard as I could today.?
Brotz finished fourth in the official results and fell from first to second place in the series standings. With two events remaining on the eight-race Buell Lightning Series, Bemisderfer now leads the standings with 100 points to 97 points for Brotz. The win at Pocono leaves Barnes in third place with 88 points, still in contention for the championship.
The Formula USA Buell Lightning Series, presented by Buell Pro Series Accessories, is a horsepower and weight-restricted Buell-only spec class. The seventh round of the Formula USA National Road Race Series will take place at Portland International Raceway, Portland, Ore. Sept. 5-8.
BIKERNET POLICE RELATIONS DEPARTMENT–what not to say. ” I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no othercars around. That’s how far ahead of me they are.”
–Rogue
LET’S ESCAPE–The other day I was feeling down about some goddamn thing and the first thing that came to mind was a long ride. Just after I install a set of highbars on that Road King I’m riding out to Tombstone, Arizona to visit the Kennedy’s. Damn I love the desert on a motorcycle. I don’t care what Jose says about Kings.
I know I had something to add about the site, but what the hell. There’s always next week, or the Sunday Post, if you’re a Cantina Member. Goddamnit, it’s happy hour and the girls are waiting. Let’s Ride.
–Bandit
